Easter joke

[Tuffus]

Effingham, IL- In a quite literal case of March Madness, Doris Stevens, had family members buzzing with laughter and concern at her annual Easter Brunch this Sunday. “I don’t know what they are all fussin’ about today, but I don’t want any part of it”, stated the 86 year old Effingham native. Upon arrival, Doris’ daughter, Mary Stevens, knew that there was an  instant cause for concern. “When I got here, I noticed that my mom had put a spiral ham in my sons Easter basket.” Taking immediate action, Mary ran into the kitchen and removed what appeared to be a honey glazed Wilson football from her mothers oven. In an apparent spell of Dementia, Doris had been slow cooking her grandson’s Easter present at 325 degrees for almost an hour. Unnoticed, Mary quickly handled the situation while Doris was preoccupied with her grandchildren. With Mary’s quick action and her brother, Andy’s, dry humor, the family managed to avoid the awkward Easter ordeal. “Can I ‘handoff’ or ‘pass’ anyone some more ham”, joked Andy as the meal came to an end. Although a close call, the brunch went on to be a huge success. After fielding various questions about her diet and medication schedule, Doris seemed visibly tired, as she took her leave from the dinner table.  Taking a rest on the “Davenport”, Doris watched the children hunt Easter eggs. When asked to comment on how the holiday was going, she explained, “They all think I’m nutty, but I still got it. My daughter told me she would have Easter at her house next year.” She laughed as she passed the jelly beans, “I’ve been trying to get these assholes out of my house for 5 years now”, whispered Doris.

[hipower]

Wonderful!

 

Hosting gamily holiday gatherings is a rite of passage. Most "kids" really don't want to make the change, but the parents/eldest family members usually get to a point where it is not only better and easier for them, but a necessity because of the logistics and stress involved.

 

Yes...I speak from experience on the topic. But I bet we all can as well.