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Thoughts and Questions on CCW


Guest Fenris

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Posted

OK, bear with me. I want to describe things as accurately as possible so this might be a little long.

When I was in college and my primary residence was in a different state I had a permit to carry. When I moved to TN I was misinformed and thought my permit was no good here, etc. So I let it lapse.

Now, 13 years later I will be taking the permit class at Guns & Leather in January.

I think I can admit that 80% of the reasons I got the first permit were wrong. Coolness, status, etc. My feelings this time around are totally different.

In some ways I am very fearful of the responsibility. It is not a panicked fear, but a power tool fear. My father always told me that it is the moment you stop being a little bit afraid of the power tool that you end up with something missing. I now have a wife and a small child. The "what if's" run through my mind whenever I think about it. Honestly, I would rather *not* have to carry, but there are bad people in this world and I want the capability to protect my family.

I have a huge fear of my child(ren) bypassing my security and finding my gun (even when it's under lock & key and the key is hidden). I have a fear of a condition 1 gun having a misfire. I have a fear of a condition 3 gun being useless. I have a ton of questions and recognize that while I grew up around guns, short and long, and consider myself very conscientious around guns and fairly proficient with guns, the responsibility that comes with carrying is a bit intimidating.

I told my wife that I consider the CCW like CPR training. Every time I see my handgun I pray to God I never have to use it, but I also pray I will be capable if I have to.

Are these concerns normal? Do some of the training courses beyond the permit class deal with these issues? Am I way off base and worrying about things I don't need to worry about?

I realize now my reasons for wanting to carry this time around are right a lot moreso than last time.

I appreciate thoughts and will be happy to answer clarifying questions.

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Guest superdrew4000
Posted

Maybe some of the more experienced fathers and gun owners will have a little more insight, but let me say that I share your "little bit of fear." Ironically, I got into firearms and shooting about the same time we found out my wife was pregnant.

I can totally appreciate the dilema of security against curious children vs. actually utility. Right now my primary home defense handgun is in a small safe in the closet. I think I could still get to it in a flash if I had to... but who knows.

After the holidays, I'm going to be picking up a nice 12 ga. shotgun. If it were up to me, it'd be kept loaded and nearby at all times. Don't think my wife is gonna be all too happy with that.

As for as the HCP is concerned, I plan on getting mine in the spring, and my wife has already said she doesn't want me to carry a gun around her. I tried to explain that I'm not really worried about my safety, but hers and our families... didn't make much headway. God bless her, she voted for Obama.

Posted

On Carry...

I think these "fears" you mention, in my mind, only makes you a more responsible gun owner.

Many people, I feel, don't spend enough time considering the responsibility and liability that comes with it. I feel that there is more to it than deciding to take an eight hour course and paying the fee. Some serious thought needs to be given. If you are a spiritual person, have you searched the scriptures to show thy self approved? Not what a bunch of guys on a gun board think you should do but are you confidence your actions are approved in the sight of your God. What will you tell your kids as they grow and see you carrying? You don't want them to be afraid to play out in the yard unless dad is there with a gun, yet you want them to understand that a firearm is a tool, and that there are sometimes bad people with bad intentions. Do you have a lawyer that you would call after an incident? Do you have a line of credit to pay for the lawyer should it goto a civil case?

When I first got my permit, about 15 years ago I started seeing a lot more questions arise as I thought about it. Legal, moral, ethical, economical, etc. (But then again, sometimes I think too much.)

Additional training can never be a bad thing. CIS Training (here on the board) has been a personal goal of mine to attend as soon as I can. But I also feel that smaller courses, even if they are not as in-depth as CIS could still be beneficial.

Kids...

I have two kids, and was brought up around guns. The policy at the house is no loaded weapons. (Visitors may enter armed, as long as the weapon stays holstered.) Some may not like this rule, some may think it silly... but it's the rule I have.

I fear a neighbor kid that hasn't been raised around guns visiting more than my own kids.

Guest pjblurton
Posted

Children have a natural curiosity about firearms. The best way that my wife and I have found to deal with this is take our children shooting with us. By doing this we accomplish three things. 1. Thier natural curiosity has been satisfied. 2. They learn proper handling and firearms safety. 3. They learn exactly how much destructive power these weapons produce and learn a healthy respect for it.

I understand from one of your other posts that one of your children is 3. This may not be practical solution for you just yet. I have always kept a loaded gun of some type in the home since B.C. (before children) and always made sure that the children knew the rules regarding them. Asside from my primary carry weapon, all guns are stored in my house with a full magazine and no rounds in the chamber with the safety off. Of course they are all semi-auto, pump-action or lever-action. You can't readilly do that with that ole smokewagon of yours.

You may just consider making your storage location less accesable and then prevent child access to that general area.

Good luck!

Guest Revelator
Posted

I don't think about it too much. Moral and ethical considerations? To me there's just no point in that. Let whatever happens happen, and deal with it the best you can. I've gotten my training (and I continue to train..I'm taking my third advanced gunfighting class in the last 15 months this weekend) and I practice regularly. I feel confident, and I have no qualms carrying everywhere I go, every day of the week.

Fortunately neither does my wife. She's not really into guns, but she totally supports my carrying one and having them in the house. Superdrew, I don't know what to say to you on that one. Kinda sucks.

We don't have children so we haven't had to deal with that issue yet.

As for the safety issue, I carry my pistol with a round in the chamber always, and there is no external safety. I have absolute confidence in my ability to safely handle a gun this way. Some people would say that that's crazy, that the gun is going to just go off, like it has a mind of its own. I'd like to call these people retards but that's probably not fair. They've obviously never been around guns and they just don't understand.

It all comes down to what you're comfortable with.

Guest sharpshooter01
Posted

I too have somewhat of a fear of carrying. I grew up around mostly rifles and shotgun, I'm fairly new to the handgun scene. My fear is not of defending my home, if you come in my house unwelcome you will be welcomed with a .45, .357, or shotgun whatever I get my hands on first. My fear is more being out in public and being threatened to the point of pulling the gun. I have always been taught if you pull a gun on someone you better make sure your ready to use it. I'm sure after my carry class I will be more comfortable with this. As for children, I have a 1 1/2 year old daughter so right know there isn't much of a problem with guns in the house. I plan to take her shooting when she is old enough and teach her to respect any gun. She will always be taught gun safety, even toy guns are not to be pointed at anything she doesn't want to shoot. I will see how she reacts to my teaching when she is old enough to know better and that will determine how I store my guns. As for now they are in various places around the house where she can't reach them.

Posted (edited)
My fear is not of defending my home, if you come in my house unwelcome you will be welcomed with a .45, .357, or shotgun whatever I get my hands on first. My fear is more being out in public and being threatened to the point of pulling the gun.

I understand this completely. I am just as comfortable defending my car as well as my home. It is as you say, out in public walking into a convenience store, etc.

Edited by Fenris
expanding my original thought.
Posted (edited)

I have 4 kids, 9, 7, 5, 13 months. I carry an XD with one in the chamber and ready to go, ie condition 1.

First of all in regards to Condition 1, get a good quality handgun from a reputable manufacturer and a good quality holster, before you buy, ask questions, do a search on here for information about them. If you already have them, ask us on here. (I don't know if you already have this stuff). I carry an XD, no external safety other than the grip safety, and it has never gone off when I didn't want it. I feel confident enough that if I were to drop it on the concrete, that it would just bounce around and then lay there, not that I do that but if it were to happen.

Kids: Teach them, talk to them, educate them, take the "mystery" out of it. My two older kids have been shooting with me, they have both taken a class at RangeUSA here in Memphis specifically for kids where they learned safety, they learned about different types of firearms, they learned what if scenarios and they shot different kinds of guns on the range. You practice fire drills with your kids, practice drills with them in regards to firearms. As mentioned, I am not scared what my kids will do, but I am scared what other kids might do. So I do keep them out of reach and the one I carry is usually on me or out of reach if it is not on me.

You are responsible enough to ask good and valid questions on here about the responsibility of carrying, you have told us your concerns and fear. That shows, to me anyway, that you are a pretty responsible guy and will be fine and welcomed in to this brotherhood of card carrying members! Your fears are normal. Go to a class, beyond that of the permit class. Permit class satisfies a requirement, additional classes teaches you how to become more proficient, more comfortable with your firearm and how to use it in different situations.

Is it natural to have these fears? yes. None of us on here want to use our handguns for self defense, but we are prepared. Its like insurance, hope to never use it, but I got it.

You are doing the right thing in asking questions, you are doing the responsible thing in wanting to learn and to get over your fears. Carrying a handgun, there is a huge responsibility, that must be taken seriously, and you are. Good luck in your journey and ask your questions. :search:

Edited by db99wj
I kant spel gewd.
Posted

I can't really add much to what's been said, but I speak to people everyday that are just getting into handguns or just getting into carrying and they all have some type of fear. "Will my kids get to it?" "What if I kill someone?" "What will my friends and/or family think?"

The key really is to learn, train, and practice. A gun IS a power tool. The moment you don't respect it, you or someone else can be accidentally hurt. You'll find your balance. We all have. I advise sharing your concerns with your instructor. Any good instructor will help you work through your fears and offer insight.

Posted

Everything posted is right on. The only thing I can add is, discretion is the better part of valor. I try to be totally aware of everything going on around me, or what I may be walking into. I would hope I could back down, leave, not get out of my truck and get involved in a potential shooting situation. I would much rather use the cell phone, call LE, stay in the area to relay everthing I could to LE when they arrive.

There are also a lot of buts and either/ors in life. We try to use common sense and good judgement throughout life and pray for the best.

Posted

One other thing I did not mention. In my case, once I started this, and was carrying my handgun.....everywhere, my situational awarness has increased by leaps and bounds. I always thought I was pretty observant, but man, by learning, by training, by discussing issues I have grown in this area. I will and do profile the hell out of people when they walk in someplace and I am there. From what they are wearing, any signs that they are carrying, if they are acting weird.

Posted
...In my case, once I started this, and was carrying my handgun.....everywhere, my situational awarness has increased by leaps and bounds.....

Ditto.

It seems ironic to me that some anti's opine that one's desire to carry a handgun is tantamount to some sort of Bronsonesque vigilante complex, when actually the opposite is true. Most of the heightened awareness I've noticed on my part is to absolutely minimize the chances of having to use the very piece I'm legally carrying.

- OS

Posted
Ditto.

It seems ironic to me that some anti's opine that one's desire to carry a handgun is tantamount to some sort of Bronsonesque vigilante complex, when actually the opposite is true. Most of the heightened awareness I've noticed on my part is to absolutely minimize the chances of having to use the very piece I'm legally carrying.

- OS

+1 I'm much more likely to avoid a situation now then I think I ever was before. After 3 years of carrying and 2 working in private security, plus the military I'm always looking for the suspicious dudes and the exits.

Why gunfight if you don't have to?

Guest nraforlife
Posted

That dark alley that you wouldn't walk down unarmed is still the same dark alley even when armed.

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