Near zombie experience today

[Guest Revelator]

I'm at home by myself watching college gridiron. The wife is out running errands. I've got my pistol holstered on me like almost always (even at home). The doorbell rings and I get up to answer it. I was a little surprised because I wasn't expecting anyone, but hey, it's a neighborhood. As I'm walking to the door it starts to slowly open. This stops me in my tracks. If you're going to ring my doorbell, you better wait for me to open it. I'm about six feet from the door and it's opened several inches. I've stopped completely.

Then a bloody hand starts to slowly reach through.

My first thought was, somebody's been terribly hurt and they need help. The hand reaches through some more and I back up a couple steps. My left hand goes to my pistol and I grip it, ready to draw. I have no idea what's on the other side of the door but I remember thinking, not necessarily in so many words, see what/who they are, keep them a safe distance away, and if necessary fire on them.

Then the door swings open all the way and it's my wife. She's giggling and holding this:

She got it at the store and thought it would be cute to play a joke on me. Yeah, real funny. Happy f'n Halloween. I won't lie, my heartbeat got up there. That hand was extremely realistic looking and I thought I was about to get in the middle of something bad. And I can't remember now if the door was locked. It usually is but she may have used the key to quietly unlock it.

[Guest tnmale46]

lol

[Guest GUTTERbOY]

Well, at least you didn't draw down on her.

[Guest Grout]

Not a good idea considering your constant state of awareness.

[Metalhead]

Lol, man thats cruel.

But honestly man that could have ended badly, I hope she knows now not to play "zombie apocalypse" on someone fully expecting it to happen one day!

[Guest Revelator]

I felt like I was still several steps away from lead flying. She was being very quiet and eerie and I think I was responding likewise. Now if she had run in screaming that would've been a different story. But she knows not to do that. She knows I'm 3/4 paranoid and that I've turned the house into a small arsenal.

[towerclimber37]

LOL!!!

Nice. Happy Halloweenie!

[Guest abailey362]

first sign of the zombie's final coming - testing the waters. While still in plain clothes (and skin) the zombies will use "fake" and "toy" zombie parts to test our reaction time to better plan their attack. We may think zombies are dumb and slow...but after eating all that brain, they have to gain some smarts

[r1mattrr]

I don't play the sneaking in the house jokes on my wife anymore now that we both have a firearm on our nightstands. I'm pretty sure I would get shot.

[TGO David]

My wife and I had a talk last night after reading this thread. She understands that this would probably get someone shot.

Now on the other hand, I absolutely want to know where the bloody arm came from so that I can let our Doberman gleefully prance around with it in his mouth when the Trick or Treaters come.

[Guest db99wj]

My wife and I had a talk last night after reading this thread. She understands that this would probably get someone shot.

Now on the other hand, I absolutely want to know where the bloody arm came from so that I can let our Doberman gleefully prance around with it in his mouth when the Trick or Treaters come.

That would be awsome, pics once it is done please....