school to ban "bullying trigger"

[BigK]

http://wtvr.com/2014/03/17/my-little-pony-backpack-ban/

 

So this VA school calls the My Little Pony backpack this 9 yr old boy carries to school a trigger for bullying. What's next?

[TrickyNicky]

Well if there's anything worse than a bully, its a group of bullies with authority.

[JPS]

I wouldn't really want my boys carrying a 'My Little Pony' backpack, but since when do we ban bullying 'triggers' instead of the actual bullying?

[TMF]

I get why this is silly, to make a rule that a kid can't carry a certain backpack because it makes him a target, but seriously; it does.  Where is the child's father on this?  I get that the kid's mommy doesn't understand the heartless nature of little boys, but the kid's dad should.  Of course other kids are going to pick on him, that is just reality.  I think this kid is in for a rough childhood if his parents are sending him out with "punch me/kick me" signs on.

[Garufa]

Why is this boy's mother sending him to school with a My Little Pony backpack?  I seriously doubt there is a school in this country were he would not be tormented.

 

And what TMF said.

Edited March 18, 2014 by Garufa

[BigK]

As a parent, when my kids were that young, I felt it was my responsibility to protect my kids from things. That includes their own bad decisions. No way I'd buy my 9 yr old son a My Little Pony backpack for school. Maybe that's mean, but I'm a pragmatist.

 

Admitting there is such a thing as a "trigger for bullying" is progress in my opinion. Come on, didn't we all grow up knowing how to minimize/avoid certain things?

Edited March 18, 2014 by BigK

[Mike.357]

i agree with you TMF,  but is it up to the school to think for the parents?   Maybe send a note home or give the kid a backpack out of lost and found.

 

We end up with worse problems when we let others decide on what common sense is,  especially when it is about out kids.

 

It is a tough situation.

[wileecoyote]

I am certainly against schools banning otherwise legal items and behaviors, however it does seem kind of creepy and unusual for a 9 year old boy to carry a backpack which most would associate with little girls. The same would be true if he decided to wear pink pants or a bow in his hair... not illegal and shouldn't be banned, but if the kid decides to do these things then he better "man up" and take what goes along with it. Not condoning bullying, which is clearly wrong, but kids that behave oddly or different than the rest are going to be treated by their peers a bit differently, same as in adult life. We shouldn't run to protect kids from every little thing in life, rather we should prepare them for responsible adulthood by helping them realize that there are choices and consequences. Now if this kid were handicapped in some way then it's totally understandable and he should be given the necessary slack, but if he's otherwise normal and healthy then it's time for him to toughen up a bit or behave in a more traditional manner until he is ready to brave being different.

[JPS]

I agree about the backpack, but still think focus should be on the behavior instead of the 'trigger'.  I remember being teased (bullied?) because I took my lunch in a paper bag instead of the cool GI Joe, etc. lunch boxes some of the other kids had - would today's school administrators be forcing me to find a lunch box?

[TMF]

i agree with you TMF,  but is it up to the school to think for the parents?   Maybe send a note home or give the kid a backpack out of lost and found.

 

We end up with worse problems when we let others decide on what common sense is,  especially when it is about out kids.

 

It is a tough situation.

 

No, it shouldn't be up to the school.  But, I'm going to try and empathize with school officials here, as I can imagine working in that school and seeing this poor kid showing up in this backpack and being the center of ridicule... geez, I can't imagine how tough that would be to watch.  I bet if the mom had to watch it she would learn a lesson on how things are versus the way they should be. 

 

But back to empathizing with school officials.  If I were a teacher there I wouldn't take it upon myself to tell a parent what kind of backpack they can send the kid to school in.  I would, instead, call this kid's mom and try to arrange a parent/teacher conference to explain the reality of a 9 year old's world.  Parents, I think, forget what it was like at that age.  Teachers don't see everything, and even if they did, being the social outcast kid with no friends is just as bad as being tormented.  9 years old is the start of some really tough, socially awkward years, and starting that off with something that might follow him all the way through those years is doing some real damage to that kid.

 

Like I said, to quote Sergeant Barnes, "there's the way things are, and the way they oughta be." 

[JAB]

I wouldn't really want my boys carrying a 'My Little Pony' backpack, but since when do we ban bullying 'triggers' instead of the actual bullying?

 

Since we started living in a politically correct 'no one is responsible for their own bad actions' society that tends to give more rights to the offender than the victim.  It is the same society that wants to push an agenda in which some maniac wouldn't be responsible for raping 33 nuns and murdering kindergartners because his mommy and daddy didn't fix him enough grilled cheese sandwiches when he was a child.

Edited March 18, 2014 by JAB

[Hershmeister]

Wow- so much wrong here where to begin.... In my day lunchboxes were metal, ao if you got picked on because your box wasn't "cool" you could bonk the offender with it - somehow a soft sided pretty pony bonk doesn't seem like it would cause much pushback. I appreciate the "anti-bullying" efforts of schools, but we're never going to eliminate social clicks and the human nature children to be nasty nasty creatures at times.

[Capbyrd]

1.  The school didn't ban anything.  A guidance counselor told the boy that it wouldn't happen if he left his bag at home.  No official bans on anything.  
 

2.  The school is wrong.  As soon as there is physical contact, they should be punishing the bad guys.  Regardless of what sets them off.  Physical contact is unacceptable unless to defend oneself.  

 

3.  And most importantly...WHO CARES that he likes MLP.  Tons of grown men do.  All you dad's that want your little boys to grow up and be manly men...do y'all get upset when a girl is a bit of tomboy?  Its a double standard and really only exists because you are afraid that your son might have the gay.

[TMF]

[quote name="Capbyrd" post="1126380" timestamp="1395158757"] 3. And most importantly...WHO CARES that he likes MLP. Tons of grown men do. All you dad's that want your little boys to grow up and be manly men...do y'all get upset when a girl is a bit of tomboy? Its a double standard and really only exists because you are afraid that your son might have the gay.[/quote] I think you're completely missing the point of everyone who has posted if you think that's what this is about. This is you projecting your preconceived notions. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Capbyrd]

Point three is NOT directed at anyone specifically.  It is meant generally as the people that I have talked to personally about this have all taken issue with the fact that the boy likes girly things.  Which is a double standard. 

[Chucktshoes]

[quote name="Capbyrd" post="1126380" timestamp="1395158757"] 3. And most importantly...WHO CARES that he likes MLP. Tons of grown men do. All you dad's that want your little boys to grow up and be manly men...do y'all get upset when a girl is a bit of tomboy? Its a double standard and really only exists because you are afraid that your son might have the gay.[/quote] :wave: I ain't skurred. I live watching My Little Pony : Friendship Is Magic with my little girl. It is a great show that is full of a lot of good lessons. I'd go as far as to say that some folks here would be well served by watching and learning from it.

[TMF]

[quote name="Chucktshoes" post="1126385" timestamp="1395159512"]:wave:I ain't skurred. I live watching My Little Pony : Friendship Is Magic with my little girl. It is a great show that is full of a lot of good lessons. I'd go as far as to say that some folks here would be well served by watching and learning from it.[/quote] I have a daughter and read the My Little Pony books to her. I've also been known to be decorated with Sofia the First stickers and sing the song from Frozen to her when we FaceTime, and I'm not afraid of being made fun of by anyone who sees that. But I'm not a 9 year old. Anyone who doesn't try to empathize with the world a 9 year old boy must brave as he receives his position in the pecking order of a barely evolved troop of chimpanzees is allowing their own personal issues with societal norms and gender roles get in the way of common sense. Perhaps we'll live in a society soon where little boys can act like little girls and not be made fun of and be picked on by their peers, but until then it is doing great harm to your kid to use them as a social experiment to prove how progressive a parent you are. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[JPS]

The school didn't ban anything.  A guidance counselor told the boy that it wouldn't happen if he left his bag at home.  No official bans on anything.  
 

And most importantly...WHO CARES that he likes MLP.  Tons of grown men do.  All you dad's that want your little boys to grow up and be manly men...do y'all get upset when a girl is a bit of tomboy?  Its a double standard and really only exists because you are afraid that your son might have the gay.

 

My mistake - nothing was banned.  Where does it say though that the kids who did the bullying were told to knock it off?  Were their parents contacted? 

My point is that these days our society (schools, government, 'fill-in-the-blank') too quickly looks to assign blame for things on the victim instead of the people commiting the act. 

 

As a parent, I will advise my son not to carry a MLP backpack not because I'm afraid that he 'might have the gay', but because I don't want him making choices that set him up for ridicule or bullying. 

 

And honestly, I really doubt that 'Tons of grown men' like My Little Pony....

[Capbyrd]

My mistake - nothing was banned.  Where does it say though that the kids who did the bullying were told to knock it off?  Were their parents contacted? 

My point is that these days our society (schools, government, 'fill-in-the-blank') too quickly looks to assign blame for things on the victim instead of the people commiting the act. 

 

As a parent, I will advise my son not to carry a MLP backpack not because I'm afraid that he 'might have the gay', but because I don't want him making choices that set him up for ridicule or bullying. 

 

And honestly, I really doubt that 'Tons of grown men' like My Little Pony....

 

 

It doesn't say that.  It doesn't say anything about the bullies being reprimanded at all.  Which is a problem in my eyes.  

And if you doubt me, google Brony.  


 

[TMF]

[quote name="JPS" post="1126399" timestamp="1395161089"] And honestly, I really doubt that 'Tons of grown men' like My Little Pony....[/quote] They're called Bronies. It's creepy. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Edited March 18, 2014 by TMF

[JPS]

And if you doubt me, google Brony.  


 

 

OK.  I stand corrected...  Kinda.

[Chucktshoes]

[quote name="TMF" post="1126392" timestamp="1395160262"]I have a daughter and read the My Little Pony books to her. I've also been known to be decorated with Sofia the First stickers and sing the song from Frozen to her when we FaceTime, and I'm not afraid of being made fun of by anyone who sees that. But I'm not a 9 year old. Anyone who doesn't try to empathize with the world a 9 year old boy must brave as he receives his position in the pecking order of a barely evolved troop of chimpanzees is allowing their own personal issues with societal norms and gender roles get in the way of common sense.Perhaps we'll live in a society soon where little boys can act like little girls and not be made fun of and be picked on by their peers, but until then it is doing great harm to your kid to use them as a social experiment to prove how progressive a parent you are.Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk[/quote] I wasn't addressing that part of it. I pretty much agree with what you said. I just don't think 9 is too young to stop protecting the kid from the harsh reality that the world is full of assholes and sometimes our actions will attract them. The lesson I was taught when I was growing up was that I have two choices. I could alter by behavior to avoid drawing bullies it I could toughen up and learn how to deal with them. The second option is the better one as sometimes no matter what you do, the assholes will find you.

[Chucktshoes]

[quote name="JPS" post="1126407" timestamp="1395161628"]OK. I stand corrected... Kinda.[/quote]

They're called Bronies. It's creepy.Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

Screw y'all! It's a good show. :lol:

[daddyo]

The way we dealt with bullies when I was a kid was to give 'em a bloody nose.

[mikegideon]

The way we dealt with bullies when I was a kid was to give 'em a bloody nose.

 

Yep. My dad... "Hit him as hard as you can. You might get your butt kicked, but he'll respect you". It worked too, including me getting my butt kicked a couple of times.