Serious Legal help needed.

[Fivestring63]

Ok, I got one for you.

Has you actually been served? If not then screw em, carry until they serve you. If you have been served then get a (and I can't beleive I'm saying these 2 words together) good lawyer, you might just need it.

If I rembmer the other situation, he was served before he was no longer "allowed" to carry.

Yes, I've been served and it specifically says "No guns, No ammo".

I told her tonight again about the seriousness of what she did. She totally agreed to drop it the next court date no matter what she has to do, even to claim she overreacted and none of the stuff on there was true. Which it wasn't to begin with.

[Guest Boomhower]

I told her tonight again about the seriousness of what she did.

Thin ice here...very thin

[Guest bkelm18]

Well I'd say seriously f*cking up someone's life for made up reasons is pretty dang serious.

[Im Neero]

I recommend a bad lawyer.

[mrming]

Only having watched my parents divorce, I don't have much useful to add.

However, if she has decided she is 'entitled' to a pound or two of flesh from you, then letting on how 'serious' you feel this is won't exactly improve your bargaining position. I was going to suggest perhaps seeing if your lawyer could counter file in a different district, try for a change of venue but your profile says east TN.. so knoxville is probably the appropriate court.

[Guest GlockRule]

F getting married, jeez.

[Guest Abominable_Hillbilly]

And this is why EVERYONE who has had a bad OP against them need to take the JUDGE and the EX to court on slander/defamation of character (the ex) and civil rights violations (the judge). That has to be a violation of your 5th, 6th, or 7th rights at a minimum.

Judges have even more immunity than the police or prosecutors. You have to understand this one thing: the government protects its own.

Yes, I've been served and it specifically says "No guns, No ammo".

I told her tonight again about the seriousness of what she did. She totally agreed to drop it the next court date no matter what she has to do, even to claim she overreacted and none of the stuff on there was true. Which it wasn't to begin with.

For a small investment, you could be recording all of these things. It's perfectly legal in Tennessee.

She may not be a bad person, but good people can do very bad things. Especially under influence of a careless, unprofessional attorney.

[TGO David]

I told her tonight again about the seriousness of what she did. She totally agreed to drop it the next court date no matter what she has to do, even to claim she overreacted and none of the stuff on there was true. Which it wasn't to begin with.

Geez... I don't mean to kick you in the balls here, but that was a really dumb thing to do. You always play your cards close to your vest in a divorce case and never tell the opposing side anything that they do not have an absolute need to know.

You're going to have to be smarter than this or risk losing your ass because you were a good ole boy that got suckered bad by a bitch of an ex-wife and her foaming at the mouth pitbull of an attorney. Your mindset is totally screwed up here because your heart's involved! It's war, plain and simple. I don't care how much you think you're getting along or how much you still love her.

This is the voice of experience talking. Heed it! Sorry if it seems like I'm being hard on you, but what I see here is a brother setting himself up in a bad way. Look out for number one (YOURSELF) and **** everyone else! You can be mad at me now, but you may end up thanking me later if she and her attorney start trying to bury knives in your back.

[Marswolf]

I think the first thing my wife's divorce attorney asked her was if I had ever hit or threatened her. Fortunately, she is a person of integrity. We just had had enough of each other....

Still had to straighten out some language in our agreement. Divorce lawyers are the scum of the earth. They try to sneak in stuff even when their client doesn't want it there. If you don't really understand how to research the law, you need to hire better scum of the earth than your spouse.

[TGO David]

Divorce lawyers are the scum of the earth. ... You need to hire better scum of the earth than your spouse.

Edited for brevity and quoted for the absolute ****ing truth. It's amazing what attorneys don't tell their clients; namely to shut the hell up and not have social conversations with their soon to be ex-wife.

Then again, it's also likely a racket. Your attorney knows that the more you talk, the more work they get to do to fix what your mouth caused, which means more hours that they can bill you for.

[Fivestring63]

Geez... I don't mean to kick you in the balls here, but that was a really dumb thing to do. You always play your cards close to your vest in a divorce case and never tell the opposing side anything that they do not have an absolute need to know.

You're going to have to be smarter than this or risk losing your ass because you were a good ole boy that got suckered bad by a bitch of an ex-wife and her foaming at the mouth pitbull of an attorney. Your mindset is totally screwed up here because your heart's involved! It's war, plain and simple. I don't care how much you think you're getting along or how much you still love her.

This is the voice of experience talking. Heed it! Sorry if it seems like I'm being hard on you, but what I see here is a brother setting himself up in a bad way. Look out for number one (YOURSELF) and **** everyone else! You can be mad at me now, but you may end up thanking me later if she and her attorney start trying to bury knives in your back.

Tungsten, I respectfully disagree with you on this. She doesn't have and can't afford an attorney for the OP and cannot be granted one from the court. She is pretty nieve (SP?) and emotional when it comes to a lot of things and I calmly explained to her the consequences of what she's done by filing the OP. Which, I suspect, is something they didn't tell her when she filed. She is the one that let her emotions get away from her for doing that, not me. This isn't my first divorce either. I do realize I have to tread softly.

Edited for brevity and quoted for the absolute ****ing truth. It's amazing what attorneys don't tell their clients; namely to shut the hell up and not have social conversations with their soon to be ex-wife.

Then again, it's also likely a racket. Your attorney knows that the more you talk, the more work they get to do to fix what your mouth caused, which means more hours that they can bill you for.

Dang Tungsten, I actually agree with you on the rest.

We've worked out a lot since we've been able to make contact and the divorce hasn't even been filed yet. She's got a place to stay, visitations with the boys are good, some bills straightened out, some household items split up between us. So far the only thing we'll have to go through court for is what the child support payments will be.

[TGO David]

I'm pessimistic by nature when it comes to matters of divorce because unfortunately I've been through it more than once. Each time I learned something new and always the hard way.

Just remember that it's you vs. her no matter what it looks like on the surface. Like the old saying goes, diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggy" while you reach for a heavy rock. Make sure your attorney is the heaviest rock you can afford.

[Guest eyebedam]

Tungsten, I respectfully disagree with you on this. She doesn't have and can't afford an attorney for the OP and cannot be granted one from the court. She is pretty nieve (SP?) and emotional when it comes to a lot of things and I calmly explained to her the consequences of what she's done by filing the OP. Which, I suspect, is something they didn't tell her when she filed. She is the one that let her emotions get away from her for doing that, not me. This isn't my first divorce either. I do realize I have to tread softly.

Dang Tungsten, I actually agree with you on the rest.

We've worked out a lot since we've been able to make contact and the divorce hasn't even been filed yet. She's got a place to stay, visitations with the boys are good, some bills straightened out, some household items split up between us. So far the only thing we'll have to go through court for is what the child support payments will be.

Not to sound like im on Tungsten bandwagon or anything but dont trust her ant farther than you could throw her. Ive already been through it once. Now 8 years later I get a summons over our child together & it is all made up lies. Crazy stuff. Then she will call trying to sound nice but shes recording everything I say. Women can be very evil. Tungsten has told you right as far as this goes. Jumt remember it is war & protect yourself as much as possible. Trust but Verify & push all emotions to the side. Mine has me so stressed right now I think im about to have a stroke but I

will just have to watch everything I say & do.

[Marswolf]

Someone earlier said they won't get married.

This is a highly recommended approach.

[molonlabetn]

I won't be getting married again... not because I regret it (entirely the opposite), but because I know that it would be a billion-to-one to get that lucky again, and I just don't have the stomach to try.

Best wishes.

[BryanP]

I won't be getting married again... not because I regret it (entirely the opposite), but because I know that it would be a billion-to-one to get that lucky again, and I just don't have the stomach to try.

Best wishes.

I'm tempted to agree with you having lost my wife 8 months ago. I can't say I won't ever meet someone, but I doubt it will be soon.

[Guest Engloid]

I'm supposed to get my HCP anyday now according to the lady I talked to in Nashville.

Now the bad part. My wife filed an Order of Protection against me a few days ago. I was gonna fight it tooth and nails because of totally baseless claims, but she told me the other night that on the next court date this month that she was gonna drop it and I know she will. As of now, no guns, no ammo.

So what's gonna happen to me now? Will I get a call to return my HCP? After the order is dropped, will they still want it back? Will I have to go through a review process?

Don't be a fool and not go to court on that day/time, unless a court clerk tells YOU that the hearing isn't going to happen. Women can be really devious, and if she was upset enough to file to get the order, she may be deceitful enough to con you into not going to court.

You may want to tell her that if she does show up in court, you will be asking the judge to grant the order. If the OP is granted, she is not allowed to come around you, any more than you are allowed to go around her.

In TN, if you fight the OP, and loose, you will never be able to own a handgun again (in TN). If you agree to it, you will not be allowed to be in possession of a firearm until the OP expires. After that, you will be allowed to again. The state puts you between a rock and a hard place, in which they persuade you to give her the OP. Think about it...if she wants an OP, you don't want to be around her anyway, so what's a court order telling you not to be around her needed for?

[Guest Engloid]

F getting married, jeez.

An OP can be gotten against you by any person that lives with you, even if you're not married. This includes mother, father, brother, sister, etc....even a roommate.

[Guest Boomhower]

I won't be getting married again... not because I regret it (entirely the opposite), but because I know that it would be a billion-to-one to get that lucky again, and I just don't have the stomach to try.

Best wishes.

I'm tempted to agree with you having lost my wife 8 months ago. I can't say I won't ever meet someone, but I doubt it will be soon.

Time heals ALL things!! Even the current case that we are discussing here.....Best of wishes to both of you's guy's

[Guest Engloid]

F getting married, jeez.

An OP can be gotten by anybody that lives with or once lived with you... roommates, mom, dad, siblings, etc.

From what I understand, the case has to be reviewed by a judge before it becomes official and you lose your firearm rights. But you need to talk to a lawyer about it.

This is true. The first step in an OP is an Ex Parte OP. What it is:

She goes to the court clerk (whom coaches her on what to write) and fills out an affadavit. She tells stuff like "he yelled at me, and threw the phone. He broke my cd's." This is considered domestic violence. The clerk carries it in to the judge, who signs it. The order is then effective for 10 days. She also tells the clerk where you can be found, so that the papers can be "served" to you.

The order states that it is valid for 10 days, and also has a court date on it for a hearing that will include both parties and the judge.

You get the OP in hand, and are immediately (effectively) booted from your house because she is most likely there or will be...and you can't go anywhere around her.

Since she has been talking to you and letting you see the kids, you NEED to document evidence of this. Her willingness to meet you for exchanges proves that she's not that scared of you. In TN, you can record all phone calls in which YOU are a part of the conversation...without any notification to the other parties. This is admissable in court.

by a preponderance of the evidence[/i], per TCA 36-3-605. Now that's nowhere near the burden required for a criminal conviction, and as in Seaslug's case it may all come down to what judge you get,

Judge Swann will tell you straight out in his opening lecture that if it's your word against hers, he would rather err on the side of caution, and will grant the order...unless there is reason to think she may not be truthful in her statements.

She totally agreed to drop it the next court date no matter what she has to do, even to claim she overreacted and none of the stuff on there was true. Which it wasn't to begin with.

This is what you need to get on tape!!! Get a phone recorder from Radio Shack. When she leaves the house or is another place, hook it up and call her. Get her to admit that the things she wrote to get the OP weren't true. Then, if she goes to court and wants to flip-flop, you can hang her high. You need to play your cards right. You want an ace in the hole, and hopefully you won't ever have to play it...but don't be played for a fool. Get that ace!!!

She intentionally chooses to file all of these cases in the 4th Circuit Court because of Judge Swann's infamous willingness to both issue and extend OP's with little or no evidence provided by the petitioner,

It's widely known and many lawyers do this. If you have a pending divorce, you can easily get the case moved into the divorce court (Chancery). The drawback is that Chancery court usually has a long backlog, and you'd have to agree to extend the Ex Parte order until you got into Chancery...which could be years.

[Fivestring63]

I appreciate you guys interest. The big turning point will be this coming Thursday when we go back to court. I'm gonna try and have a meeting with my lawyer Monday.

[Oh Shoot]

To have had two divorces of my own, I guess I'm one lucky guy...

Just had supper with my 2nd (and longest married) ex. We get together 3 or 4 times a year, golf together once in a great while.

While I did not want the divorce, at least it was amicable as it could be at the time, and since we had property and she was making lots more $$ than me, she paid ME as part of settlement.

No kids, though, and I know that is a HUGE diff, always.

Hoping for the best all round for ya,

- OS

[mhm2a]

Good luck....I hope all goes well. I have been married for 5 years and have 2 wonderful children and can not imagine your frustration with the OP.

[Fivestring63]

:woohoo:ORDER OF PROTECTION """DISMISSED"":woohoo:

We went to court today and the OP was dismissed. My lawyer told me that as long as its been dismissed, I won't have anything to worry about with my HCP.

I'm sure he knows what he's talking about because when I was in his office, I saw a can of gun cleaner in one of his cabinets.

Now maybe this weekend I can make my Wal-Mart initiation. I have to go by there anyway to get one of my boys glasses picked up.

And for anyone wondering about what happens next, we are getting a divorce. So far it looks like it will be uncontested as we still are getting along fairly decent and are able to split household and finances up. We're still not agreed on child support/alimony yet, but thats something we'll work out that I won't bore you all with.

I appreciate everybodies support and advice this past couple of weeks and also allowing me to vent my frustrations on here.

[Fallguy]

Good to hear....