The random story thread.

[bubbiesdad]

I was seriously considering castration when

[Guest nra37922]

the Viagra I had taken earlier kicked in so...

[Guest Broomhead]

so I no longer had to pee on my shoes or roll out of bed. I needed a stiff drink to take the edge off, so I...

[Guest nra37922]

slapped the mrs on her ample fanny and told her to fix me a Vodka Martini shaken not stir and

Edited April 5, 2013 by nra37922

[Caster]

...and that's when Ohshoot knocked on the front door wanting to show me his new pet black panther. It was wearing a sequined collar and it's name was......

[hipower]

Liberache, named for the idol of his youth.

[Guest Broomhead]

Liberache eyed me as if I were a prime cut of meat, it made me nervous so I fed him some/a...

[Caster]

...some tofu and bean sprouts which really....

[hipower]

loosened up my bowels and I had to run for the...

[Caster]

...commode, but as I say there I was confused. I couldn't fathom how feeding the cat tofu gave ME the squirts. Luckily I had my iPad with me, so I looked it up on google and you'll never believe what I found......

[Guest nra37922]

a CDC warning about a vicious new stomach virus called the Obama Squirts with the recommendation for symptom relief being...

[RED333]

To vote for a Demarcate in the next election, I just could not bring my self to that so I just...

[Guest nra37922]

decided to tough it out and...

[Earl33]

Tough it out by hoarding ammo, high capacity magazines and Preparation H until the viris had time to run its course. I said to myself, Self.....

[Guest nra37922]

we're not in Kansas anymore...

[Guest ancient_serpent]

but at least I'm stocked with lots of toilet paper. Better run out and 

[Guest nra37922]

buy gold...

[ted]

Ammo so I can .....

[Guest ancient_serpent]

scare off would be burglars using my faaaaaabulous bullets. After loading up, I pulled out a huge...

[Earl33]

Bottle of George Dickel, took a big swig and settled in for the night watch against  Democratic BS. Then suddenly, outside I heard a strange noise... 

[Guest nra37922]

so I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

[homeagain]

and poached some reindeer freezer meat, brought some fat guy dressed in red into the house at gunpoint, forced him to strip naked and....

[bubbiesdad]

discovered it wasn't a guy, but was Rosie O'Donnell, so after bleaching my eyes, I

[Guest nra37922]

thought what the heck, the missus is out and viva Viagra so I...

[RED333]

AM NOT GOING THERE! but did put her out of the house, where the dogs,,,