"They drew first blood, not me"

[BigK]

I was attacked last week at work, not once, but twice. I did nothing to provoke either assault...I was minding my own business.

The first encounter happened on Tuesday, when I was headed back to my cubicle when I was shot twice with a USB powered missile laucher. The second attack ocurred on Friday. Two assailants with Nerf guns creeped up on me. One laid down suppressive fire from my right while his accomplice circled around and shot me.

I wanted to put this in "Survival and Preparedness", but it's really only my pride that suffered. Nonetheless, I vowed to serve the cowards that waylayed me a dose of their own medicine. So, today I started building a jelly bean launching trebuchet.

It may lack mobility and I may not have the same rate of fire as my attackers, but I plan to win the war with cool points instead of littering the office landscape with bodies. I think that will repair my wounded pride faster than bloodshed.

I'll post pics as my project progresses.

Edited February 18, 2013 by BigK

[DaveTN]

It’s too bad you have to work somewhere that such violence in the workplace is tolerated. You need a zero tolerance policy.
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest sL1k]

is this going to be "man on fire" denzel revenge ?

[Sam1]

is this going to be "man on fire" denzel revenge ?

 

I think his workplace would frown upon tannerite suppositories  :rofl:

[vontar]

Where do you work and are they hiring?

 

I work in a office full of people that have misplaced sticks in their ass when it comes to anything fun.

[Guest sL1k]

he probably works in I.T. :D

[itchytriggerfinger]

he probably works in I.T. :D

 

LOL.  Yup, I was totally thinking that sounds like something my department would do.

 

BTW, the trebuchet works well as long as you don't hit the ceiling.  Takes a bit of trial and error, but you will get that perfect launch.  How do I know?  Because one of our guys had one :)

 

Here are some on Think Geek.

[Guest sL1k]

LOL. Yup, I was totally thinking that sounds like something my department would do.

BTW, the trebuchet works well as long as you don't hit the ceiling. Takes a bit of trial and error, but you will get that perfect launch. How do I know? Because one of our guys had one :)

Here are some on Think Geek.

that's one of my fav sites cubicle warefare cool gadgets and bacon !

[NoBanStan]

Put up a nerf free zone with yellow tape. That's better than a nerf proof vest.

[Tncobra]

I recommend making a marshmallow gun

[BigK]

Yeah,I work in IT for an education software company. Great place to work (they're even HCP friendly).

The Nerf Nerds will rue the day they darkened my portcullis.

Edited February 18, 2013 by BigK

[monkeylizard]

Skip this silly kinetic warfare. Go straight to the psychological warfare. Hide a Think Geek Annoy-A-Tron in their cubicles and watch them surrender.

[c.a.willard]

I was thinking of something along the lines of a RC airsoft apache

[BigK]

I'll have to make a better counter weight, b/c this will only send a marble-sized plastic ball about 6 feet. At least it works.

Edited February 18, 2013 by BigK

[LngRngShtr]

read somewhere on a Treb site the magic ratio is projectile/counterweight 1/75-100  so a 1 oz bean would use 75-100 ozs weight.

 

found it  http://oaklandballistics.com/images/Build_Hinged_Trebuchet.pdf

 

Annnddd since we are geeking out heres the math behind it

 

http://www.algobeautytreb.com/trebmath35.pdf

 

was looking into a golf ball launching treb once..http://www.legionxxiv.org/trebuchetpage/  has some good tips at the end for tuning your flight path

 

John

Edited February 18, 2013 by LngRngShtr

[daddyo]

I've always wanted one of these:

 

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/8a0f/

 

I think I'll order one next payday.

[QuietDan]

I'm thinking this levity and flexibility of mind yields some sort of workplace benefit, like better software or fewer HR complaints.

 

In our high ceiling break-room we had a ping pong table and flew tiny RC helicopters in mortal combat. And we produced high quality still and video imagery under budget.

[GoneBallistic]

Put up a nerf free zone with yellow tape. That's better than a nerf proof vest.

Hahaha yes!!! I'm not sure it would work quite as well as a "gun free zone" though. Those things are fool proof!!!

Edited February 18, 2013 by GoneBallistic

[BigK]

I've always wanted one of these:
 
http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/8a0f/
 
I think I'll order one next payday.

 

That's one of the WMDs that assaulted me at the office.

 

I'm thinking this levity and flexibility of mind yields some sort of workplace benefit, like better software or fewer HR complaints.
 
In our high ceiling break-room we had a ping pong table and flew tiny RC helicopters in mortal combat. And we produced high quality still and video imagery under budget.

If you have good employees that meet deadlines and churn out high quality work, you gotta keep them happy. The little things like a top-knotch coffee service, air hockey, foosball, free Rockstar Energy drinks, and no PTO policy go a long way.

[G27]

Skip this silly kinetic warfare. Go straight to the psychological warfare. Hide a Think Geek Annoy-A-Tron in their cubicles and watch them surrender.

I'm pretty sure you can cause a suicide with one of those...