30 things you won't hear a Southern Boy say...

[BimmerFreak]

TOP 30 THINGS THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:

30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.

29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

28. Duct tape won't fix that.

27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.

26. We don't keep firearms in this house.

25. You can't feed that to the dog.

24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.

23. Wrestling is fake.

22. We're vegetarians.

21. Do you think my gut is too big?

20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.

19. Honey, we don't need another dog.

18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?

17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.

15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

14. Trim the fat off that steak.

13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

12. The tires on that truck are too big.

11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.

10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.

09. My fiancé, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

08. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

07. Checkmate.

06. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

05. Hey, here's an episode of 'Hee Haw' that we haven't seen.

04. I don't have a favorite college team.

03. You Guys.

02. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY

SAY:

01. Nope, no more for me. I'm driving!

[Im Neero]

That's good stuff.

[strickj]

That should read 28 things.... I said just these two today

30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen

06. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

[dunndw]

you forgot: That Obama would be a great president

[TripleDigitRide]

Very nice!

I was fitting in just fine, until the "You Guys" comment. I've been in the south for 13-14 years, but still say "You Guys".

[BimmerFreak]

you forgot: That Obama would be a great president

YES.........WE..........CAN..........(defeat him)

[Guest nraforlife]

Add one to the list

I hate Hooters

[nightrunner]

Add one to the list

I hate Hooters

i thought that belonged on the list of things you'll never hear a straight man say

[Punisher84]

i thought that belonged on the list of things you'll never hear a straight man say

ZING!

[Guest Grout]

Actually I have a grapefruit for breakfast along with an energy bar every morning.

[Marswolf]

Sounds good to me...Vern.

[enfield]

Nah, okra ain't no good when you cook it that way.

Sorry, I can't go bass fishing today - I have a dentist appointment - just a routine cleaning.

I think fireworks are too dangerous and shouldn't be sold to the public.

Jimmy Jack - you shouldn't be stealing and selling that copper wire!

There's just too many meth labs in the area!

Fried green tomaters? What the hell's that?

[nightrunner]

Nah, okra ain't no good when you cook it that way.

Sorry, I can't go bass fishing today - I have a dentist appointment - just a routine cleaning.

I think fireworks are too dangerous and shouldn't be sold to the public.

Jimmy Jack - you shouldn't be stealing and selling that copper wire!

There's just too many meth labs in the area!

Fried green tomaters? What the hell's that?

enfield, you werent born here were you?

[Guest builderwood]

You forgot "toodles"

"I can't go fishing, there's so much laundry to catch up on"

[NuTcAsE]

Very nice!

I was fitting in just fine, until the "You Guys" comment. I've been in the south for 13-14 years, but still say "You Guys".

Sorry Man, It's a genetic thing, You gotta be born with it. When a yankee moves down here, It ain't like one of them Borg fellers from Star Trek where we stick some carburetor parts on you head and your assimilated to the collective. We've spent generations "refining" this gene pool down here.

[enfield]

enfield, you werent born here were you?

Nope, West Virginia.

[Guest Angel 24/7]

Yep! Sounds like my house...........

[xd shooter]

HEHE

[Guest darkstar]

Hey get it right....it's not "you guys" it's "you's guys"

[Guest Engloid]

07. Checkmate.

Oddly, my buddies and I, in my younger days, used to all get together drinking, and wind up playing chess. This wasn't an occasional thing, it was a few times each week.

[molonlabetn]

"Who's sober enough to go on a beer run?"

"That can't be fried."

"I'd like the unsweet iced-tea, please."

"We've been to Gatlinburg too many times."

[memphismason]

"We've been to Gatlinburg too many times."

That is great. True and funny