What happened to common courtesy?

[Timestepper]

Heard a guy say the other day, "Fcuk man, nobody gives a cr*p about that stuff anymore, so why should I?!!" I just looked at him and said, "I dunno... Maybe just to let the rest of the world know that you're not nobody?"

Bottom line, neither common courtesy, nor common sense are all that common anymore. Those of us who were raised up to have and display both are obviously in the minority in this day and age. But you know something? That's a minority I will proudly claim as my heritage and continue to work at until the day I die.

[LazyAce]

I was born in Middle Tennessee and spent a lot of my younger days there before we moved to Nebraska. I agree with the others. If you try to be nice most people think you are a jerk. I have had it happen in all sizes of towns, it doesn`t really matter. Some of the small country towns might be a bit better at being nice but forget the bigger cities. A few years ago I had some medical issues that left my ballance a little messed up so I started using a cane when I was out with my wife shopping. Some people look at that and give me a stupid look as to why are you using that, now I have it with me just so I can beat the smart mouth kids over the head or accidentally trip one of them. I come back to Tennessee every fall and enjoy every minute that I am there. Wife & I have talked about moving back but am tied down here with too many things. Enjoy the Southern way of life

[Glenn]

I remember during the whole women's lib thing often getting cussed for holding the door for a woman. My answer was "My daddy bought me to hold the door for a lady. I guess he didn't know that not all women are ladies." That would usually just get me cussed again. I generally hold the door for anyone that is behind me. It's just the way I was raised. If I forget, my wife never fails to remind me. I don't really care if they say thanks.

Glenn

[TMF]

I remember during the whole women's lib thing often getting cussed for holding the door for a woman. My answer was "My daddy bought me to hold the door for a lady. I guess he didn't know that not all women are ladies." That would usually just get me cussed again. Glenn

A general rule I live by is to treat every woman like a lady until she shows that she ain't one.

[Ebow1]

I can't count how many times I've been walking just a little bit behind somebody just to watch them throw a door open without a glance and let it shut right in my face. I always give a glance back when I'm at a door, to see if there's anybody else comin', and if they're close enough that it wouldn't be weird to hold the door that long I hold it open for em.

[Glenn]

A general rule I live by is to treat every woman like a lady until she shows that she ain't one.

I agree. But cussing you for holding the door for them pretty much moves them out of the "Lady" class.

Glenn

[TMF]

I agree. But cussing you for holding the door for them pretty much moves them out of the "Lady" class.

Glenn

I would agree. I would treat my strippers with more respect and dignity than some uppity feminazi with an axe to grind 'cause she has penis envy.

[Dolomite`s Breezy]

Courtesy is lost on most. Another that gets me is traffic. It's always a "me" first attitude. I like to think that every time I say thank you or let someone turn while stuck in traffic that they might pass it along to the next guy.

You ever seen the aggresive driving signs ? I think people take that literaly.

Edited July 29, 2012 by Sour Kraut

[Guest Springfield1911guy]

I was raised in a small town environment where everybody knows everybody and some sort of respect still existed. Im not saying there arent any rude people in TN. But if you ask me there are far more up here in yankeeland. Cant wait to get home. I talked with a Nebraska woman yesterday, who had only been to the south one time in her life and loved it. The reason she said was the people and the whole "southern hospitality" thing that doesnt even partly exist in her neck of the woods. What got the whole conversation started was my thick TN accent and i called her mam.

I really must respectfully disagree with you Sir. I have lived here in Tennessee for only 3 years. I am a native New Englander born and raised. After 3 years, I'm still looking for an example of this elusive thing called "Southern hospitality". I live in a semi rural area where there are a lot of neighbors. Not one every came over and introduced themselves or, welcomed me to the neighborhood. That's something we do even in New England!

I swear ,sometimes people here are still fighting the Civil War, or they haven't yet heard that it is long over.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not in any way implying that all Southeners are like that. Most of the folks are just fine and respectful. I'm just saying people are people no matter where you go. It doesn't matter what part of the country you come from, what matters is, what kind of people raised you.

[zapfbroad]

When I was in elementary school me & several of my friends got to school super early because we walked. We would take turns holdin the door for every teacher the was comin in with their bags of stuff. It's still in me now, some people give funny looks, some guys will give the nod or 'thanks'. Women sometimes just waltz by like I'm in their way while others will actually pause, make eye contact, & say thank you. They have the oddest look like you just made their day...I think that keeps me doin it sometimes when ppl are rude repeatedly.

Sometimes I have to remind my wife to let me get the door but she's gettin better lol.

When people breeze by like I'm the footman of the castle & they just avoid looking at me I occasionally add a loud 'your welcome'.

Sent from my SPH-D700 using Tapatalk 2

[zapfbroad]

I've driven across the country & it is a noticeable difference in road courtesy whenever I get within 25mi of the TN line. In TN it's like "well I have to go 5 or 6 exits on i-65/24 so I need to scoot way over to the left & practically park my ass doing 1mi over the speed limit of 70 and not move if someone is obviously floating along behind me doing 80, well hmmpf, they just need to slow down to the speed limit anyways so I'll help them out (oh but wait I didn't really even notice they were behind me for like 2 minutes, now I'm nervous and should slow down to 68)"

Most other states people understand the slower traffic keep right means slower, not just slower than the speed limit, get out the way. but more importantly pay attention, who knows why i'm flying like that, maybe i'm a horrible driver and don't see you, it's in your interest to remove yourself from my path.

My other pet peeve is when people will ride holding hands with others cars next to them and don't move forward or back to allow traffic to pass. But my favorite is when it's two+ lanes. im in lane a. lane b has 2 vehicles. obvious to me they have been in a line for a half mile. i'm attempting to speed past. within 50ft of my approach 2nd car in lane b must absolutely Now get into lane a and slowly pass the lead vehicle causing me to have to brake suddenly.

sorry i drive alot, road courtesy in tn isn't that good

[Guest bkelm18]

I really must respectfully disagree with you Sir. I have lived here in Tennessee for only 3 years. I am a native New Englander born and raised. After 3 years, I'm still looking for an example of this elusive thing called "Southern hospitality". I live in a semi rural area where there are a lot of neighbors. Not one every came over and introduced themselves or, welcomed me to the neighborhood. That's something we do even in New England!

I swear ,sometimes people here are still fighting the Civil War, or they haven't yet heard that it is long over.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not in any way implying that all Southeners are like that. Most of the folks are just fine and respectful. I'm just saying people are people no matter where you go. It doesn't matter what part of the country you come from, what matters is, what kind of people raised you.

I've been all over this country and I've yet to really see a difference. I've met great folks up north and I've met people I'd just as soon toss out of an airplane in the south. I've grown up not expecting courtesy. If someone holds open a door I say thank you but I don't expect it in return, and I certainly don't get offended when I don't get a "you're welcome". Life is less dissapointing when you don't expect much from other people.

Edited July 29, 2012 by bkelm18

[Jonnin]

Time passed.

Holding a door open went from being nice to being sexist. Speaking to people went from friendly to fearful ... today, if someone says "HI" to me, I am waiting for the "my car broke down and I need $20 cause I lost my job and ...." to follow up. A generation of selfish anti-everything folks reproduced and taught their kids their ways. Those grew up and whelped and taught their kids even stranger ways. Mostly, time moved on and its hard to fault the people (its hard to call someone rude when they were brought up differently, with different standards). These days, to be rude is to be aggressively hateful (cut someone off in traffic intentionally, shove past someone, etc) rather than passive things (did not speak to you, really? Not a big deal anymore!).

[Dolomite`s Breezy]

Oh yah. .the Honey , darling, sweetheart thing dont fly with me either.

One woman did that to my husbnd and I told her not to do that again.. I told her since she didnt know my husband and I was standing right next to him , that I thought it was rather inapropriate to call him that. She sad its a southern thing.I told her that I dont care. and not do it again.I dont think thats kosher. Unless you have an intimate relationship with someone , you do not call someone elses husband /wife Honey or whatnot.

And it has nothing to do with being jelaous or insecure in my marriage or relationship.I am quiet secure in mine )

[Dolomite`s Breezy]

Time passed.

Holding a door open went from being nice to being sexist. Speaking to people went from friendly to fearful ... today, if someone says "HI" to me, I am waiting for the "my car broke down and I need $20 cause I lost my job and ...." to follow up. A generation of selfish anti-everything folks reproduced and taught their kids their ways. Those grew up and whelped and taught their kids even stranger ways. Mostly, time moved on and its hard to fault the people (its hard to call someone rude when they were brought up differently, with different standards). These days, to be rude is to be aggressively hateful (cut someone off in traffic intentionally, shove past someone, etc) rather than passive things (did not speak to you, really? Not a big deal anymore!).

I guess then its ok to not be toughtful of others? being brought up differently is one thing.. but not teaching your kids common courtesy is not. I was brought up " differently" in a different country but still managed to hold open doors and say thank you and please . .and be respectful of elders and others.

I guess you are right.. standards have fallen by the wayside and have been replaced by people being fearful of being mugged or taken advantage of when someone asks for a dollar bill for a bus ride home. ( and honestly.. how many do really use it for such? )

I dotn even roll down my window anymore or motion them to step away from my truck when someone aproaches it. There has been a a time or 2 when I had put my hand on my gun on my side when someone came approached my truck..I hate that I have gotten so fearful )..

[tnhawk]

In memphis, common coutesy is seen as a weakness by those who wants their entitled respect.

[Guest 6.8 AR]

I've driven across the country & it is a noticeable difference in road courtesy whenever I get within 25mi of the TN line. In TN it's like "well I have to go 5 or 6 exits on i-65/24 so I need to scoot way over to the left & practically park my ass doing 1mi over the speed limit of 70 and not move if someone is obviously floating along behind me doing 80, well hmmpf, they just need to slow down to the speed limit anyways so I'll help them out (oh but wait I didn't really even notice they were behind me for like 2 minutes, now I'm nervous and should slow down to 68)"

Most other states people understand the slower traffic keep right means slower, not just slower than the speed limit, get out the way. but more importantly pay attention, who knows why i'm flying like that, maybe i'm a horrible driver and don't see you, it's in your interest to remove yourself from my path.

My other pet peeve is when people will ride holding hands with others cars next to them and don't move forward or back to allow traffic to pass. But my favorite is when it's two+ lanes. im in lane a. lane b has 2 vehicles. obvious to me they have been in a line for a half mile. i'm attempting to speed past. within 50ft of my approach 2nd car in lane b must absolutely Now get into lane a and slowly pass the lead vehicle causing me to have to brake suddenly.

sorry i drive alot, road courtesy in tn isn't that good

I've not noticed that to be exclusive to

Tennesseans. It can be a problem here,

though.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Guest 6.8 AR]

There's an old saying about killing people

with kindness. I try to do that. If it offends

some, I tried. Courtesy seems to have

gone elsewhere, but that doesn't mean

you shouldn't do your part.

I get to sleep quite well at night.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Jonnin]

I guess then its ok to not be toughtful of others? being brought up differently is one thing.. but not teaching your kids common courtesy is not. I was brought up " differently" in a different country but still managed to hold open doors and say thank you and please . .and be respectful of elders and others.

I guess you are right.. standards have fallen by the wayside and have been replaced by people being fearful of being mugged or taken advantage of when someone asks for a dollar bill for a bus ride home. ( and honestly.. how many do really use it for such? )

I dotn even roll down my window anymore or motion them to step away from my truck when someone aproaches it. There has been a a time or 2 when I had put my hand on my gun on my side when someone came approached my truck..I hate that I have gotten so fearful )..

Its not that it is ok to not be thoughtful, its that america has raised 2-3, even 4 generations that have been taught entitlement and importance of self combined with being taught to fear strangers. I do not like it any better than you but I understand it and am not offended by it. When this is the normal behavior, expecting more is no longer reasonable.

[Gun Smith]

There's an old saying about killing people

with kindness. I try to do that. If it offends

some, I tried. Courtesy seems to have

gone elsewhere, but that doesn't mean

you shouldn't do your part.

I get to sleep quite well at night.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yep, it's an old saying :

Romans 12:20 To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.†21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

[10-Ring]

I hold doors and whatnot anytime I get the chance. A couple of years ago I had to wear a sling for a couple of months due to an injury. I was amazed at the kindness of strangers. I'm somewhat of a loner so I'm pretty independent but it can be a little tricky to manage with one arm, especially when you have things to carry. Numerous times people would jump ahead of me to get a door for me. The girl a Chik-Fil-A that took my order walked my order over to my table for me because she realized that it is hard to manage a try and a drink with one hand. The clerk at Kroger asked if he could take my groceries out to my car for me. It really made me feel good to live in rural East Tennessee, where courtesy is in fact not dead. Now Tennessee drivers on the other hand are a different story. It seems for most that once in the drivers seat Tennesseans care only about themselves.

[RobertNashville]

Frankly, I'm a lot more concerned about what has happened to common sense and the ability for rational thought since both seem to have almost disappeared.

[sigmtnman]

...

I swear ,sometimes people here are still fighting the Civil War, or they haven't yet heard that it is long over.

...

Damn yankees don't understand playing possum...

[bubbiesdad]

Damn yankees don't understand playing possum...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QuNihdGBu8k