What would you do? Road Rage incident

[kesava]

On my way to Murfreesboro, whilst on I24 with wife and kids in tow to buy her a car I had a very interesting encounter. Long story shot, I was cut off, either on purpose or accident, regardless, I felt it my civic duty to honk as a reminder to both

A.) Check your blind spot before you change lanes

B.) Use a turn signal when doing so

As being freshly cut off, I was inherently closer than my usual he SLAMS on his breaks. Not a "hey quit riding my bumper" brake tap, but full on ABS, Tire squealing, loosing steering control, avoiding hitting a box of kittens, full on brakes. I missed him my centimeters. At that speed (60mph), there would have been some serious injury. I passed him, obviously he was a danger and I didn't want to be behind him, given his track record. As I passed, I rolled down the window and gave him the finger. I think, perfectly appropriate given the situation and the easiest way to convey my frustration (and nearly soiled underwear). I wanted to double down and ask my wife to hold the wheel, but I refrained.

He speeds up, pulls next to our car and (this is the part that still gets my blood boiling.... a lot)

makes a gun shape with him hand and fires at each of my family members. Including two young boys, 3 and 10.

He continued to do this when I both slowed down and sped up. I didn't want to stop or pull off because I was afraid that's what he would follow. It would have been a very tragic and stupid idea to engage this guy. He was taunting me into stopping. He eventually stopped, but I am curious, is it illegal to do that at someone? He was in a black Ford F150, with an E prefix tag.

[Guest rebeldrummer]

wow man....not sure about any of the legalities of dudes actions....just glad to be reading this post as opposed to what could have been the story in tomorrows paper! i think you did the right thing.....a person like that will "get his" eventually. he will do that one day to someone who wont be as smart and logical as you. glad you and yours are all ok.

rd

[Mike.357]

first mistake ( aside from what the other guy did) was honk. The incident was over why honk? He acts like an ass and then you one up him by giving him the bird. At this point you escalated whatever else happened.

Here is an idea. Other driver is dangerous and acts an ass. Slow down or stop, let him go away. Continue on you way. There is no way to win in this game. You kept playing.

Anything that happened after the intial incident is on you.

Who cares what he is driving? Who cares about his tag prefix?

Basically the other guy was an ass, and you stooped to his level.

[Guest bkelm18]

first mistake ( aside from what the other guy did) was honk. The incident was over why honk? He acts like an ass and then you one up him by giving him the bird. At this point you escalated whatever else happened.

Here is an idea. Other driver is dangerous and acts an ass. Slow down or stop, let him go away. Continue on you way. There is no way to win in this game. You kept playing.

Anything that happened after the intial incident is on you.

Who cares what he is driving? Who cares about his tag prefix?

Basically the other guy was an ass, and you stooped to his level.

+1

You shoulda been an adult and just let it go. Were you really willing to risk your family's lives over some ******* on the road? Were his actions illegal? Beats me, but your actions escalated it. I've had someone very deliberately try to run me off the road before, I let it go. Life is too short for childish BS, no need to make it shorter.

[ttocswob]

A better use of your finger would be to dial up and report this idiot.

He (almost successfully) executed a classic insurance maneuver - cut you off and force you into his rear. Your fault. He gets a new ride. Your horn-blowing likely had nothing to do with it.

Your gesture, while emotionally satisfying, escalated the incident. His gestures constitute assault, IMO.

[Guest ArmaDeFuego]

Sounds like you got caught up in the moment & let what was going on get the better of you.

Its fine to honk if someone is coming into your lane, but thats where it should have ended. When he slammed on his brakes, you should have maybe honked again, but giving the finger was a little over the top, especially with your kids in the car. I probably would have slowed way down & let him get far ahead of me.

You cant win with people like that. Well ok, you can, but at what cost? Its better to let them go on. Like someone else said above me, eventually they will get theirs....

[Guest Red5]

I'm quick on the horn if someone is in the process of coming over on me, but if it's over and done, you've missed your opportunity. After that, you're playing his game and you get what you got.

Edited October 3, 2011 by Red5
sp

[Guest FHTMcrt]

You asked what I'd do, so I'll tell you what I used to do and what I do now: When I was 30, your story would have been my story. Now that I'm twice that plus 9 and have a Handgun Carry Permit which I am loath to lose, when I encounter similar situations, I try to just say the "Serenity Prayer" and move on. I figure the other person knows what he's doing, and I'm not taking the bait. Not saying it's easy, it's just what I do.

[kesava]

first mistake ( aside from what the other guy did) was honk. The incident was over why honk? He acts like an ass and then you one up him by giving him the bird. At this point you escalated whatever else happened.

Here is an idea. Other driver is dangerous and acts an ass. Slow down or stop, let him go away. Continue on you way. There is no way to win in this game. You kept playing.

Anything that happened after the intial incident is on you.

Who cares what he is driving? Who cares about his tag prefix?

Basically the other guy was an ass, and you stooped to his level.

I suppose you're right. I guess I am an a$$ for the finger. Thanks for your input. Gives me a different way of looking at it.

Edited October 3, 2011 by kesava

[Mike.357]

don't feel like you are an ass. learn from the situation and be glad nothing bad happened to your family.

You were not justifed in flipping the guy off. Doing that stoops you to his level. Be above it!

Bottom line is you went home safe. Call it a win!

Next time this happens I expect a post saying what happened and that you laughed it off and went and got your wife a new car.

[Dolomite_supafly]

I know you were upset but how scared do you think your wife and kids were as this was going on. Giving him the finger only continued the interaction. Also, your kids seeing you give the finger probably taught them it is ok because their hero (you) did it. The only thing I would have used my finger for was to dial 911 if the guy continued acting like an idiot after you honked.

People drift into our lane all the time. And yes we do honk the horn from time to time. But if we get any negative reaction we leave it at that. Too many idiots in the world for me to try to fight.

After all most idiots will drag you down to their level and beat you with experieance.

Dolomite

[QuietDan]

Like all above. ^^^^

Don't get mad, get even.

Take the time to be cool and get the state and license plate number, vehicle description, perp description. License plate number!

Call the dispatcher at 911 in a level voice, with the identifications, road he's on, direction of travel, mile markers or cross streets, approximate speed. License plate number! All the facts. No shouting!

Throw in that your family with small children is in the car and they're completely freaked out, add the road range description, a passing reference to potential serious drug abuse, reference to the weapon-shooting gestures and potential to be armed, the slamming brakes, the wild manuevers, your concern for everyone else on the road, build the whole picture. All the facts. No shouting!

They might not send one police car, or they might send six and lay out spike strips. Can't outrun the radio.

If he continues to act the ass with the cops, he might not survive the experience.

Have a nice day!

[Guest TargetShooter84]

I know you were upset but how scared do you think your wife and kids were as this was going on. Giving him the finger only continued the interaction. Also, your kids seeing you give the finger probably taught them it is ok because their hero (you) did it. The only thing I would have used my finger for was to dial 911 if the guy continued acting like an idiot after you honked.

People drift into our lane all the time. And yes we do honk the horn from time to time. But if we get any negative reaction we leave it at that. Too many idiots in the world for me to try to fight.

After all most idiots will drag you down to their level and beat you with experieance.

Dolomite

Agreed 100%

[TMF]

One of the big things to remember as well, if you're carrying and this happens it can come back to bite you if you have to draw. I'm no lawyer, but the way I understand the law to be, if you instigate/participate in an altercation you are culpable if you have to draw your weapon in self-defense. For example, if someone cuts you off and you give him the finger, then you both pull over for some road rage action, he pulls a weapon and you pull your pistol, you'd be in the wrong as much as him. Someone please correct me if I misunderstand Tennessee law here, but this is the reason I avoid confrontation when I'm carrying.

I'm the same way in regard to civic duty; informing people when they do something f'ed up, but with family in the car I play the role of p*ssy schmuck. I hate doing it but people are crazy and I wouldn't want to put them in harms way.

[Guest JeremyD901]

I would have honked too. Don't feel alone man.

[MattCary]

I drive my car for a living (insurance appraiser) and over the years with the many many miles I've driven, I've had the satisfaction of calling many :poop:heads like you described in to 911 or the Highway Patrol (I'm usually on the interstate) and describing the details as one poster above described. Then I hang back behind them and observe, with extreme satisfaction, as they get pulled over.

The look on their face as I wave and drive on is priceless. They don't always get pulled over, or you don't always see it, but, when it does happen, the warm and fuzzy feeling lasts a while.

If it is a commercial vehicle, I call in to their corporate office and raise hell about "assault with a deadly weapon" (their vehicle or large truck.) I like to imagine that the company safety nazi doesn't take kindly to such incidents.

As stated above, getting into it on the road brings you down to their level. Keep it on your level, keep your calm, and hit 'em where it hurts. A ticket, or at least a talking to by a LEO, or worse, lots of questions with potential repercussions from their employer.

[QuietDan]

If it is a commercial vehicle, I call in to their corporate office and raise hell about "assault with a deadly weapon" (their vehicle or large truck.) I like to imagine that the company safety nazi doesn't take kindly to such incidents.

Oh yeah! If he's acted the ass once, he's done it a dozen times. The company may be looking for an excuse to can him with extreme prejudice -- your call may be the one that put's him out the door!

[Guest WyattEarp]

had a similar thing happen in 2008, driving up 65 with my gf at the time and her 2 kids. girl and guy driving in a Tahoe started coming over in our lane, i hit the horn, and there was people in front and behind so i had nowhere to go except off the road. she swerved back over, he is in the passenger seat, and flips me the bird, and starts punching his fist in his hand and looking at me all crazy like. finally hwy turned from 2 lanes to 3, so I dropped into third went over and left them behind. No bird, no angry gestures, i had tinted windows on the stang, so they couldn't have seen me anyhow.

got off at moore's lane, and was waiting at the light, they drive up the ramp on the shoulder, he gets out and starts beating on my window for me to get out but I refused, and he spits on my window, yelling at me that he's gonna kill me, kids were freakin', gf jumped on the cell and called 911, light turned, we went, he jumped back in the Tahoe, she starts driving, he's hanging out the window like a mad man screaming at us to pull over. she then cuts off 2 lanes of traffic gets in front of us and slams on the brakes on the bridge over 65 trying to get us to hit them, but I was ready for that one. gf tells me dispatcher said cops enroute, so i go around them and they follow. we go through a yellow light, and she runs a red light and nearly gets broadsided (was hoping, but no such luck). they get on the side trying to run us off the road, finally we get behind them and start following them. dispatcher says cops are like 2 miles away and closing fast, they turn around and go back towards the cops, we follow and these idiots pull into a gas station, and so we cautiously turn in, just in the knick of time too. I see 3 brentwood cops and 2 williamson county sheriff's pulling in and surrounding them, they all get out guns drawn, yelling at them to get out of the tahoe, and lay flat on the ground. We gave our statements, cop asked the kids if they were scared, they said yes, guy went to jail, she got a ticket for road rage, he got charged with inciting something or other. we also had at least 10 cars pull in and give statement's to the cops that they saw these maniacs doing all this, so that helped big time. we had to go to court for it, and he got 6 mos probation, and anger management and some fines. Turns out they were just gutter trash from Columbia, he had lost his job (that's his whiny story he told the judge, who didn't give a rip) and he was just in a bad mood.

that incident right there was what made me consider getting my permit and to start carrying. I wish I had done it a lot sooner than now, but I really wasn't ready to make that decision at that time, I still had a bit of growing up to do, and I'm glad I waited.

Anyhow, don't incite anything if you can help it. flipping the bird or gesturing just makes it worse, and you can be held just as accountable because you're continuing to fuel the incident. it's just best to slow down and let them keep going, get a plate and call it in. you start that macho bs, and you'll either get shot, or you'll end up doing something stupid to get yourself in trouble and it's just not worth it.

[TGO David]

If you've decided to carry for your protection, leave your middle finger at home.

That being said, if the guy had done this to me I would have definitely be on the phone with the THP describing the incident, the vehicle, the plate number and tailing him at a safe distance to give them updates over the phone until they could have his ass pulled over. Sometimes douchebags like this just need a little face-time with the pavement, and a State Trooper is the best person for that job.

For the record, him having an E-prefix license plate makes his actions even more inexcusable and had you called him in and pressed charges, he likely would have lost whatever civil organization affiliation he has.

[peejman]

What they said. A honk before it happens. Honking after doesn't accomplish anything. The finger accomplishes even less. Especially now that I have kids, I just grit my teeth, take a deep breath, and go on with life. WyattEarp's post is exactly why. There's way too many stupid people out there.

[UncleJak]

It always amazes me how mad people get while driving. I cannot understand it, but I see it all the time. I've accidentally cut people off before. If someone gets a little mad at me for it, I understand; however, there is no need to keep that anger. It's just driving!! I agree with everyone who said to call it in to THP.

[QuietDan]

I wish I knew what everyone else knows. What exactly does an "E prefix" mean on Tennessee plates?

[UncleJak]

I think it is some sorta "emergency" vehicle, like fire, ems, or first responder..

[Guest uzzi]

When someone honks at me, it depends on the honk - is it a long 10 second honk that translates "YOOOUUU AREEE AN IDIOTTT" or a polite little tap that says "Excuse me, I'm in this lane and you probably didn't see me." Your reaction probably was not a good example for your kids either, but no one is perfect.

There is a phsycological phenomenom when we are in our cars. We feel cocooned and protected. We do and say things with the false belief there are no consequences to them and that we are untouchable. People see our unfiltered projections and react accordingly. Notice people don't do that when they are walking down the street? Somone cuts you off walking into a store and you both say "excuse me." In a car, you both honk and flip each other off. Just the unfortunate way that people work.

[UncleJak]

"There is a phsycological phenomenom when we are in our cars. We feel cocooned and protected. We do and say things with the false belief there are no consequences to them and that we are untouchable. People see our unfiltered projections and react accordingly. Notice people don't do that when they are walking down the street? Somone cuts you off walking into a store and you both say "excuse me." In a car, you both honk and flip each other off. Just the unfortunate way that people work."

This is very interesting....I def agree, but still don't "get it". It is very curious how that mentality works.