Funny Gun Joke

[Guest tommy62]

Someone sent this to me. I thought it was funny...

I made a traffic stop on an elderly lady the other day for speeding on U.S. 166 East at Mile Marker 73 just East of Sedan , KS . I asked for her driver's license, registration, and proof of insurance. The lady took out the required information and handed it to me. In with the cards I was somewhat surprised (due to her advanced age) to see she had a concealed carry permit. I looked at her and ask if she had a weapon in her possession at this time.

She responded that she indeed had a .45 automatic in her glove box. Something .... body language, or the way she said it ... made me want to ask if she had any other firearms.. She did admit to also having a 9mm Glock in her center console. Now I had to ask one more time if that was all. She responded once again that she did have just one more, a .38 special in her purse. I then asked her what was she so afraid of.

She looked me right in the eye and said, "Not a damn thing!"

[Patton]

OLdie but a goodie.

[Guest WyattEarp]

this one is my favorite.

A man was pulled over for speeding down the highway; the officer came to the driver’s window and said, "Sir, may I see your driver’s license and registration?"

The man said, "Well officer I don't have a license, it was taken away for a DUI."

The officer, in surprise, said," Do you have a registration for the vehicle?"

So the man replied, "No sir, the car is not mine I stole it, but I am pretty sure I saw a registration card in the glove box when I put the gun in it."

The officer stepped back, "There is a gun in the glove box?!?"

The man sighed and said, "Yes sir, I used it to kill the woman who owns the car before I stuffed her in the trunk." The officer steps toward the back of the car and says," Sir do not move, I am calling for backup."

The officer calls for backup and about ten minutes another highway patrolman arrives. He walks up to the window slowly and asks the man for his driver’s license and registration.

The man said," Yes officer here it right here."

It all checked out so the officer said," Is there a gun in the glove box sir?"

The man laughs and says," No officer why would there be a gun in the glove box." He opened the glove box and showed him that there was no gun.

The second officer asked him to open the trunk because he had reason to believe that there was a body in it. The man agrees and opens the trunk, no dead body.

The second officer says, "Sir I do not understand, the officer that pulled you over said that you did not have a license, the car was stolen, there was a gun in the glove box, and a dead body in the trunk."

The man looks the officer in the eyes and says, "Yeah and I'll bet that sumbitch said I was speeding too!"

[Sandman]

[jtluttrell]

Both good.

[Caster]

Why are you carrying a pistol? Are you expecting trouble?

No, if I was expecting trouble, I'd have brought my rifle.

[Guest capt usa]

Don't mess with little old ladies.