Son just got in trouble for not answering a teachers question on if we own guns!

[robin48]

Speaking your mind either at school or at work will seldom be a benefit. Better to learn that in high school than at the wrokplace. Sometimes you have to just give them the answer they want. It certainly sucks but you won't win in most situations.

I completely disagree. There comes a time to stand your ground regardless of the consequences. She should have dropped it. It is none of her damn business. It's his business. I disagree with censoring the teachers name, but this is David's forum not mine. So it's none of my business. He is excercising his right as owner and administrator. The young man in question excercised his right to privacy.

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[R_Bert]

You taught him well. He deserves a reward for that.

Absolutely.

A fitting reward would be to buy him a firearm.

B.

[Guest TresOsos]

Congrats to your son for doing the right thing, you've done something right.

Consult an attorney and be prepared to use him, also if you have other parents of like mind

that have children in this school, let them know what is going on, organize and present a solid front.

And welcome to goverment intrution into your life, we all need to do more standing up and saying no to the "authorities".

[robin48]

What he ^ said

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[hornett22]

I agree 100%. In fact, IMO, the use of the word was quite appropriate. By continuing to attempt to use her position of 'authority' to force him to answer a question that she had no right to demand he answer, this woman stepped out of her role as 'teacher'. The use of the word 'damn', then, placed the kind of emphasis on his refusal that another word would not have placed and underscored that he was a citizen, with rights, refusing to answer a question asked of him by another citizen - of equal standing - and not by any authority that she might have vested in her as a 'teacher'. To me, she gave up any right to expect 'respect' as a teacher/authority figure the moment she tried to force him to answer the question. My feeling is that, at that point, she had already nullified the student/teacher aspect of their relationship and became one person trying to coerce information out of another without proper authority or authorization. It really was none of her damned business.

Excellent post! I agree 110% ! I like your way of thinking!

[Guest CCI]

She has no right to ask such questions!

[vontar]

As I have liked many of the posts above, I agree with most everything that has been said.

If/when you have a meeting with the school, remind them they have a zero tolerance policy on guns and she should not be beinging it up nor should she single him out in front of the class. That in fact she was trying to provoke him.

If any trouble comes to your son over this, made certain a mark hits her record as well.

I remember a drug questionaire when I was in high school, we were took to the library and told to NOT put any names on the form.

Of course we all treated it like a joke.

question, who would you ask advise about when it comes to drug? one of my friends wrote down stuff like the guy that sells pot, and so on. I wrote down cartoon names on mine. I think Donald Duck was my go to person.

[JayC]

Speaking your mind either at school or at work will seldom be a benefit. Better to learn that in high school than at the wrokplace. Sometimes you have to just give them the answer they want. It certainly sucks but you won't win in most situations.

Wow, what a sad life you must live... willing to compromise your principals just because somebody asks you a private question which is none of their business?

I'm sorry, but I don't need a job bad enough (not even in this economy) to let somebody at work force me to answer private questions, or demean myself by lying to them. I can always find another job, but I can't get back my dignity or honor.

As for the 17 year old, and what he said, I'd be marching down to the school the next day and filing a formal complaint against the teacher before they even called me about the cursing issue. While a minor at school might not have constitutional protections (don't even get me started) I for sure have freedom of speech and I'd have more than a few choice words to describe said teacher.

[extremescene]

Wow, what a sad life you must live... willing to compromise your principals just because somebody asks you a private question which is none of their business?

I'm sorry, but I don't need a job bad enough (not even in this economy) to let somebody at work force me to answer private questions, or demean myself by lying to them. I can always find another job, but I can't get back my dignity or honor.

As for the 17 year old, and what he said, I'd be marching down to the school the next day and filing a formal complaint against the teacher before they even called me about the cursing issue. While a minor at school might not have constitutional protections (don't even get me started) I for sure have freedom of speech and I'd have more than a few choice words to describe said teacher.

My point is that sometimes the fight isn't worth it. By refusing to answer that question, getting mouthy about it, or attacking that school with lawyers, you will no doubt bring the entire schools attention to the fact that you DO have guns in the house. A simple "no" would have made the situation go away and no one would know who to rob, which as stated above was a big reason for not bragging about what you have in your house. Then you could quiety complain to the principal. There is a difference between comprising your principles and "what they don't know won't hurt them." While the kid stood his ground, he also very clearly told his classmates that there ARE guns in his house.

I've lost a few jobs for speaking my mind... and almost none of the arguments were worth it in the end. 2 months without a paycheck is a much sadder life than simply keeping your mouth shut. Its not very much fun going to the range when you can't afford to pay for your bills, let alone ammunition. It would be better to quietly look for another job if your principles are truly being comprised.

[wjh2657]

As a retired Public High School teacher, a few thoughts:

I dealt with a lot of intercity children, black and white, and the use of MF was very common. On the first day of school I wrote the following on the board:

1. Yes, I am married and do have children.
   
2. Yes I do still sleep with my wife.
   
3. Yes, I am a MF, this is the true meaning of the words. It is not an insult to me, it simply states my status.
   
4. It is a waste of your time to remind me of my quite proper and legal status.
   
5. Use other words that are proper and appropriate to address me, more time efficient!
   

Damn btw is not necessarily a short version of GD. There are many who study the language who believe it is a short version of "Well, I'll be damned!" which is self reflective and not a curse. I never really got upset at the use of the word. I tried to steer the students to use more appropriate language, but as this was usually simply an expletive used during a moment of stress, it never really bothered me. The fact that I also spent 30 years active duty in the USMC may help explain my tolerance for language.

Teacher had no right to ask anything about what occurs in the home. Totally off limits there.

Edited September 10, 2011 by wjh2657

[buck1032]

Wow, whj2657, you sound pretty smart for a Marine. . Your post screams common sense, which is not so common these days.

[DaveTN]

If he got in trouble for not telling her, I would have a problem with it and go to the school.

If he told her it was none of her damn business I would have beat my son’s ass.

I would like to think the proper answer to her question is “I certainly doâ€. However I probably would tell my son I don’t want everyone one to know because I don’t want to be a target for a burglary.

[Ebow1]

I'll throw in my 2 cents here. I for one am glad your son used those exact words. I'm a firm believer in treating others the way they treat you. Give people the benefit of the doubt, be polite, be respectful, and be civil. If they don't return the favor you owe them nothing. Teacher or not.

[MikePapa1]

Never answer any of these sorts of questions. The school has no right whatsoever to ask such questions.

[gregintenn]

I'll throw in my 2 cents here. I for one am glad your son used those exact words. I'm a firm believer in treating others the way they treat you. Give people the benefit of the doubt, be polite, be respectful, and be civil. If they don't return the favor you owe them nothing. Teacher or not.

Kind of how I feel as well. I would normally be very hard on my children for disrespecting a teacher, or anyone for that matter, but assuming this exchange happened as you describe, I think your son handled it admirably. I expect a certain amount of respect shown to myself and my children as well.

[mikegideon]

Kind of how I feel as well. I would normally be very hard on my children for disrespecting a teacher, or anyone for that matter, but assuming this exchange happened as you describe, I think your son handled it admirably. I expect a certain amount of respect shown to myself and my children as well.

I try to be respectful too, but it can change when somebody else changes it. The teacher wasn't being respectful... at all.

[gregintenn]

Teachers are empolyed to educate our children. It seems to me that this is all too often forgotten. They are too busy promoting fundraisers, sleeping with other teachers, and prying into everyones' business to perform this task. Teaching doesn't look to me like a pleasant job. I do not wish to teach, but I would like to see people who do choose to teach make an effort towards teaching. How in the world is this line of questioning educating children? I believe I'd demand to find out where this originated. With the teacher? The principal? School Board?

[hornett22]

My point is that sometimes the fight isn't worth it. By refusing to answer that question, getting mouthy about it, or attacking that school with lawyers, you will no doubt bring the entire schools attention to the fact that you DO have guns in the house. A simple "no" would have made the situation go away and no one would know who to rob, which as stated above was a big reason for not bragging about what you have in your house. Then you could quiety complain to the principal. There is a difference between comprising your principles and "what they don't know won't hurt them." While the kid stood his ground, he also very clearly told his classmates that there ARE guns in his house.

I've lost a few jobs for speaking my mind... and almost none of the arguments were worth it in the end. 2 months without a paycheck is a much sadder life than simply keeping your mouth shut. Its not very much fun going to the range when you can't afford to pay for your bills, let alone ammunition. It would be better to quietly look for another job if your principles are truly being comprised.

This fight IS ALWAYS WORTH IT!

[MattCary]

Teachers are empolyed to educate our children. It seems to me that this is all too often forgotten. They are too busy promoting fundraisers, sleeping with other teachers, and prying into everyones' business to perform this task. Teaching doesn't look to me like a pleasant job. I do not wish to teach, but I would like to see people who do choose to teach make an effort towards teaching. How in the world is this line of questioning educating children? I believe I'd demand to find out where this originated. With the teacher? The principal? School Board?

Yes!

OP, please! What class was this? What was the questionnaire for? What justification did the teacher give for asking?

[DaveTN]

Being a parent is what is all too often forgotten.

Teacher’s jobs are more than just teaching. Teachers spend more time with most kids than their parents do. Unfortunately if it weren’t for teachers many kids would have no parent figures.

If a teacher does something you don’t like; have a talk with them about it.

Whether you like it or not most kid’s teachers have as much if not more impact on them than their parents do.

[Guest nmil]

Kudos to your son for standing his ground. How's about an email address or mailing address for the school or teacher so we can write a few letters on the importance of bearing arms and the importance of privacy?

[bajabuc]

Teachers do have more impact on children than parents...it's simply a fact of life the the USofA is so screwed up that teachers are more important than the parent. It's not supposed to be that way. Teachers used to be high school graduates who taught the three R's reading 'riting 'rithmatic... now they teach that a hero is one who "goes with the flow" "don't make waves" "History is wrong" "you don't need to know where that country is" "The white man oppressed the black (forgetting that a black sold the black to a white)" In some schools they are taught that farmers aren't important because food comes from supermarkets.

[Mike.357]

I do sorta have to laugh.

I am guessing nothing at all came of this student teacher interactiion. Might be wrong but unless I missed it the OP has not updated anything.

And I really laugh at all the "lawyer up" talk. This country's populace uses lawyers now instead of interacting with each other.

I am not sure a lawyer is the solution here.

[DaveTN]

I do sorta have to laugh.

I am guessing nothing at all came of this student teacher interactiion. Might be wrong but unless I missed it the OP has not updated anything.

And I really laugh at all the "lawyer up" talk. This country's populace uses lawyers now instead of interacting with each other.

I am not sure a lawyer is the solution here.

Face to face human interaction is the answer here. But we don’t do that anymore, call, text, email, seems to be the answer.

[macville]

And I really laugh at all the "lawyer up" talk. This country's populace uses lawyers now instead of interacting with each other.

I am not sure a lawyer is the solution here.

That's because "reasonable" has gone out the window and people only become remotely reasonable anymore if you lawyer up. It's a very sad state of affairs, but hey, this is the way the lawyers designed it through lawmaking (what, you think normal people get elected??)