Sharp Rabbi!

[Guest Steelharp]

A Catholic priest and a Rabbi are talking about job prospects:

"Well," says the priest, "there's a good chance that I'll be the next Bishop - maybe within the next couple of years."

"Bishop!" marvels the Rabbi, "very nice. And after that?"

"Oh, I don't know, I suppose it's possible I could become Archbishop… given luck and God's blessing."

"Very nice, very nice; and after Archbishop?"

"Ha! Well, you know, it's Cardinal after that, but it's really very unlikely. In theory, however, I could become a Cardinal."

"Lovely!" responds the Rabbi, "the scarlet would suit your complexion. So what's after Cardinal?"

The priest smiles. "After Cardinal? Well, it's Pope - but I'm hardly likely to become… hmmm, oh I suppose it's just possible. If a Pole why not an Englishman again? Yes, I could just become Pope."

"Splendid! And after Pope?"

The priest looks at him in surprise."After Pope? There's nothing after Pope! I mean, there's just God above the Pope, and I can't become God."

The Rabbi smiles and says, "Why not? One of our boys made it."

[strickj]

I thought this thread was about something The Rabbi did or did not do,not a joke from a rabbi,lol

[The Rabbi]

An IRS auditor is auditing the synagogue books to make sure they arent sending their assets off without proper accounting.

"So," the auditor begins. "I see you have bread for your dinners. What do you do with the leftovers? You dont take it home, do you?

"No" said the rabbi. We collect all the crumbs and leftovers. We send it back to the bakery and they use it for animal food. Once a year they send us a few free loaves of bread.

"OK," said the auditor. "I see you also have candles. What do you with the leftovers there. You dont use them at home, do you?"

"No," said the rabbi. "We collect all the leftovers and send them back to the candle company and once a year they send us a box or two."

Now the auditor is really trying to find SOMETHING he can pin on this guy.

"Well, I see you do circumcisions. What do you do with the leftoevers there?" he demands.

The rabbi said, "we collect all the foreskins. When we have a whole bunch we send them to the IRS and every year they send us a little prick like you."

[strickj]

:bowrofl:

[Medio]

haha I'll have to remember those for my wife. She grew up with a Jewish grandmother, and her grandma used to tell her jokes like these.

[fury2neon]