div legal Q's

[Guest 1817ak47]

ok, my wife is a looong ways away from here at this moment andI have been able to stay a few steps ahead. but with a police escort would she be able to take home furnishings away from a house that is in our name I. E. furniture, appliances etc. I intend to let her have her clothes etc.

BTW the div has already been filed as per word from my lawyers assisant

[TGO David]

In a divorce, it's typically the case that no one is allowed to remove any joint property (i.e. furnishings) from the house until after the division or property has been decided on paper.

[Pain103]

David has it. Police will not intervene in a civil issue such as divorce. I can only speak for my area but we would only stand by for someone to gather personal stuff ex. some clothes and medication if they needed someone there to keep the peace. Other than that they are told talk to your lawyer and settle it in court.

[Guest 1817ak47]

thanks. q answered. I am safe for now as far as home furnishings quickly being removed soon

[Dolomite_supafly]

It goes both ways. Do not get caught trying to remove or hide what might be considered joint property. Just because you live at the residence doesn't make it ok for you to remove items either. The worst thing for the court to think you are a turd by doing the same thing you blocked her from doing. Now it is unlikely she can prove what was and what was not there but if she can you would be viewed very differently in the court's eyes.

If there is a question over ownership the courts may force the sale of the items then divide the proceeds between the parties. Might be more financially sound to let her have a few consolation items to keep than having to replace the items that were sold. After all letting her keep a $500 television might be better than trying to replace the $2000 television that sold for $1000.

From your last thread it sounds like you are doing everything you should be. You also need to concentrate on proving she is the one at fault and not you. Be prepared for her to say you were abusive and that is why she left. Also, never have a meeting with her without some sort of witness from this point forward, preferably with the attorney present. If she tries to call you refer her to your attorney. And never loose your composure no matter what is said or done because everything is being recorded or at least assume it is.

Dolomite

[TGO David]

thanks. q answered. I am safe for now as far as home furnishings quickly being removed soon

Well, yes and no. Legally you can roast her if she removes property that shouldn't be removed until after the official division of property takes place (once the divorce is final). However, she can still very much walk out with your crap if you aren't there to stop her, and then it becomes a civil matter that has to be worked out in court.

I've been down this road before, so I'll add that most of the time folks do allow each other to take things that they agree upon before the divorce settlement. In other words, you don't want the coffee maker so you let her take that. She doesn't have room for the king size bed, so you keep that. You in turn let her take the futon because she's going to need a place to sleep at her new apartment/house/box under a bridge. You two don't contest these things, therefore the court really doesn't care, and you each get some of the necessities for setting up house at your respective places of residence.

Is that legal advice? Not at all. It's just the practical way things work out more often than not. Where trouble arises is when she wants to take the 52-inch plasma TV you just bought with your Christmas bonus and you tell her to piss up a rope. That's contested joint property and it has to be worked out in the divorce papers before it leaves the marital residence.

[vontar]

I am not a lawyer either and I did not stay as a fancy hotel last night either. I did have a Steak an Egg biscuit from hardee's this morning though.

If you two agree on a few simple items like TGO David suggests, I would get it in writing and both sign with a witness as well. Might even talk with your lawyer about that. I have never been thought a div. and don't want to.

[TGO David]

I am not a lawyer either and I did not stay as a fancy hotel last night either. I did have a Steak an Egg biscuit from hardee's this morning though.

If you two agree on a few simple items like TGO David suggests, I would get it in writing and both sign with a witness as well. Might even talk with your lawyer about that. I have never been thought a div. and don't want to.

I'm pretty sure I asked my attorney about this and she advised that it wouldn't stand up in court, so if there was a chance it might be contested, you should just leave it at the marital residence until the official division of property. Same disclaimer applies to this advice, however. Not a lawyer, not legal advice, etc.

[G27]

It's good to see so many folks sharing their experiences here to help a fellow TGO'r out, but it sucks there's so much experience. Most of you guys have been though this and healed up by now, but I'm still sorry you had to go through it.

[VERO1]

Have you changed the locks yet? Wifey may not want to play fair!

[TGO David]

It's good to see so many folks sharing their experiences here to help a fellow TGO'r out, but it sucks there's so much experience. Most of you guys have been though this and healed up by now, but I'm still sorry you had to go through it.

I appreciate the sentiment but in my case it was worth every penny to get rid of her.

[G27]

I appreciate the sentiment but in my case it was worth every penny to get rid of her.

Touché.

haha

[Guest 1817ak47]

Have you changed the locks yet? Wifey may not want to play fair!

one of the front deadbolts she broke the key for cause she didn't listen when I told here to pul back on the door when turning the key. haven't changed the back. I can getthe safe combo changed for $50 at my house:cool: fortunately the only valuables are some silver and a few firearms. I also changed my tgo screen name, as many on here knew me but I had to do a CYA

[Guest buttonhook]

you know why div. is so expensive dont you?.........Because it is worth it!

[Guest clownsdd]

If she does contact you wanting to pick up a "few things". Go by your local police precinct explain the situation and request that they meet you there at the appointed time, and do not go there until they arrive, park around the corner or something. I did this when one of my son's gf's left and wanted to come back to retrieve items. This one wanted to take the cleaning products....weird girl...I got her out to the porch and explained to the LEO she had all that was her's. He had her leave.

LEO said it was a good move, since any problems would have been a he said, she said thing and they were witnesses to the situation.

[Guest tnxdshooter]

I have a friend whos husband up and left her three months ago and she is wanting a divorce but doesnt know where he is or how to find him. Unfortunately he left her with three kids and no money. She is struggling to get buy. Since it would be hard to serve divorce papers having no idea where he might be would it be best to get it annulled and what are the grounds for annullment?

[Guest buttonhook]

div. by proxy I believe......dont quote me but I think it can be done by posting in the legal section of the paper and such

[Guest tnxdshooter]

div. by proxy I believe......dont quote me but I think it can be done by posting in the legal section of the paper and such

That might be hard to do. She is on food stamps and is a stay at home mom and has absolutely no income.

[Oh Shoot]

That might be hard to do. She is on food stamps and is a stay at home mom and has absolutely no income.

There's probably some type of welfare/charity legal service in 'Nooga. Maybe a legal aid clinic of some sort?

Contact public defender office and/or DHS and ask. Maybe UTC also; UTK has a free legal aid clinic, but that's an adjunct of the law school here.

- OS

Edited December 28, 2010 by OhShoot

[Guest tnxdshooter]

Thanks os I will have her call them.

[Oh Shoot]

Thanks os I will have her call them.

One trouble is the grounds for the divorce...if not agreed upon "no fault" (since the guy can't be found I guess that's off the table) has to be one of the "at fault" reasons. Among them are desertion and abandonment, not sure what separates the two concepts, but I believe desertion takes a year, dunno about abandonment.

- OS

[Guest tnxdshooter]

One trouble is the grounds for the divorce...if not agreed upon "no fault" (since the guy can't be found I guess that's off the table) has to be one of the "at fault" reasons. Among them are desertion and abandonment, not sure what separates the two concepts, but I believe desertion takes a year, dunno about abandonment.

- OS

He beat her, was a druggie(she has proof) and he abandoned her. Those should all be grounds for divorce.

[Guest razorblade]

A few years ago in Chattanooga my Ex (thank God) was constantly removing things from the marital home while under court order not to take property. The judge (low-life) just ignored this. Many, many thousands of dollars later I can finally say that it was worth it.

[Dolomite_supafly]

I have a friend whos husband up and left her three months ago and she is wanting a divorce but doesnt know where he is or how to find him. Unfortunately he left her with three kids and no money. She is struggling to get buy. Since it would be hard to serve divorce papers having no idea where he might be would it be best to get it annulled and what are the grounds for annullment?

Want to find him easily?

Have her go to court and file for a child support order. My sister was awarded and was receiving child support even before her soon to be ex moved out of the house or the divorce was even final. It looks like he finally moved out this week and he has been paying shild support for the last two months. They can collect using his SSN and garnish any wages he is making providing the children are his and not from a previous relationship.

Almost any legal action can have the court's fees waived because of financial hardship. When I worked around inmates I watched them do it all the time and they were allowed to file with the courts for free because they had no money or income.

Dolomite

[Guest tnxdshooter]

Want to find him easily?

Have her go to court and file for a child support order. My sister was awarded and was receiving child support even before her soon to be ex moved out of the house or the divorce was even final. It looks like he finally moved out this week and he has been paying shild support for the last two months. They can collect using his SSN and garnish any wages he is making providing the children are his and not from a previous relationship.

Almost any legal action can have the court's fees waived because of financial hardship. When I worked around inmates I watched them do it all the time and they were allowed to file with the courts for free because they had no money or income.

Dolomite

That would normally be a good idea but none of the three kids are his. They are all from a previous marriage.