Some Mondays are worse than others...

[Il Duce]

sorry to hear jaime

[wipfel]

that's pretty tough. sorry to hear about Bella.

[Jasongar8]

Hate to hear the sad news Jamie.

[Chucktshoes]

My condolences Jamie. Losing family is always tough.

[Guest Jamie]

Y'know, the more I think on this, the more I'm convinced that Bella left us on a high note...

Most of you know my thoughts on religion and such - basically that I don't "know", nor believe anyone else does or can either But somewhere in the back of my mind, I can't help but think that either Bella herself, or some higher power, decided that Sunday was the best place for her to call it a day.

The reason I think this is because, from Friday, up until 3:00pm Sunday, we, and Bella especially, had one of the best weekends I can remember in a long while.

Everybody was happy, Bella was apparently feeling better than she had in quite some time, and thanks to some unexpected help, we had plans in place to pick up the meds she needed and carry out the second half of her treatment when it was time.

However, now, having learned some things after the fact concerning the state of Bella's health, I know for a certainty that had she continued on, she would have been in for much pain and misery, before the end finally came.

You see, once she was gone, and I was working on getting her ready to go back home, I noticed how stiff her back legs had gotten. Evidently between the arthritis, and the lack of mobility that brought on, her tendons had shortened to the point she almost couldn't bend her knees.

And that, coupled with the state her stomach and digestive system was apparently in, either due to the lymphoma, some unrelated stomach/colon cancer, or even the meds she'd had to take for her knees... Well, lets just say that Bella was probably getting up and moving along when most people or dogs wouldn't have.

Knowing that now, I wish we could have done more, or at least have known the full extent of her problems. Because I'm quite certain that she was a tough old girl, and stuck around here with us far longer than she probably should have. Maybe it was love, maybe it was just plain stubbornness, or maybe even too much curiosity and not wanting to miss anything. I don't know and never will, but I'm certain she had her reasons.

Anyway, I'm grateful for the time we had with her, and will miss her very much. (Hell, I already do.) But I'm glad she didn't have to go through what I know now was waiting on her if she'd continued on much longer.

Again, thanks to all of you. This has been one of the longest days I've been through in a while now, and coming here and babbling at all of you has certainly helped.

Here's one final picture of the friend and companion that I'm gonna miss for a very long time, during happier times. It's from last Christmas, of Bella with one of the new toys that was in her stocking:

... and I really can't decide whether or not I would have liked to know then that it would be her last. I do know that this year's will be more than a little bit sadder.

Oh, and one other thing... I certainly hope next Monday is a better day than the last 2 have been.

Edited November 2, 2010 by Jamie

[vontar]

Sorry to hear it Jamie.

[hipower]

Jamie, I'm so very sorry. Bless you all. Sorry I can't seem to link this here, but google "The Rainbow Bridge" and perhaps it will help.

Edited November 3, 2010 by hipower

[Guest mosinon]

these updates makes me think I have something in my eye,

Last dog I had that went that way, and they all do, went to bed not so great but okay and woke up dead. We took him to the vet, gotta confirm that they don;t have some re animation drug or something.

A very, very sad day for me.

Every time I read this thread I think about it and get a little depressed. On the other hand every time I read this thread I remember my dog and feel lucky to spend a few years with him. I don't know if I should punch you or hug you.

No matter, sorry you lost your dog. It is a painful thing. But remember if the dog wasn't super great you wouldn't care so much. In other words, you have had a lot of experiences with a really great dog, don't be sad about the death. You knew what would be happen, be happy that you got to spend time with a really great dog. I bet Bella is grateful for the time she spent with you. Your were lucky to have her and she was lucky to have you.

[Guest Jamie]

these updates makes me think I have something in my eye,

Well, about the only update I have left to give is when I finally get her grave cleaned up and the headstone set. But I'll keep that one to myself if you like. That's probably gonna be a while anyway though, 'cause I need some rest, and I do still have other responsibilities to tend to here as well.

Last dog I had that went that way, and they all do, went to bed not so great but okay and woke up dead. We took him to the vet, gotta confirm that they don;t have some re animation drug or something.

A very, very sad day for me.

Yeah, I've been there more than once... and unfortunately, way down deep inside, already knew where we were going to end up, before we even started out Sunday evening. Still, ya gotta try, right? Even knowing that what you're seeing is a couple of steps past survivable?

Every time I read this thread I think about it and get a little depressed. On the other hand every time I read this thread I remember my dog and feel lucky to spend a few years with him.

I remember every dog, cat, lizard, hamster, etc. that I ever lost, or worse yet, had to euthanize myself.

And I figure it must prove I'm crazy, because I keep going back for more... taking in whatever comes my way that looks like it needs my help... even knowing what I'm eventually in for. Yup, there really must be something seriously wrong with me....

I don't know if I should punch you or hug you.

*shrug* Take your pick... 'cause after the beating my body and mind have both taken these past couple of days, I probably won't feel either one.

No matter, sorry you lost your dog. It is a painful thing. But remember if the dog wasn't super great you wouldn't care so much.

I dunno... I must've had many great animals then, because I still feel every single one of 'em...

In other words, you have had a lot of experiences with a really great dog, don't be sad about the death. You knew what would be happen, be happy that you got to spend time with a really great dog. I bet Bella is grateful for the time she spent with you. Your were lucky to have her and she was lucky to have you.

The closest thing I get to a prayer is the hope that Bella, and all the rest, had as good and happy a life living with me as they could have anywhere else, and that I did everything I could and should have for them. And also the hope that I continue to do as well with the ones still here, and those that are no doubt yet to come.