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For Real Ninja Training on Craigslist.

MudBugjr

By MudBugjr
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Dolomite_supafly Postus Maximus

Dolomite_supafly

Posted
Posted

When I worked in LE we had a new hire tell one of our instructors he was a ninja but not to tell anyone else. Unfortunately for him he told the wrong person if he was trying to keep something like that a secret. The ninja story was out and it made for a lot of fun working with him for the short time he was there. During training we realized he was way too uncoordinated to have anything more than just basic martial arts training if any at all. He would put on a big flashy show with arms flailing and a few screams but it looked more like he was having a seizure while trying to do some sort of new wave dance. When he did finally get done with training and come to work we would say "why don't you just go disappear into the shadows" whenever we didn't feel like hearing his stories of his conquests. It was always interesting hearing the stories though, especially hsi actual ninja conquest stories in which he always seemed to get into fights with large groups of people yet always won. He talked crap all the time, not just about being a ninja but guns, cars or anything else he could conjure up to make himself impressive.

He didn't last long. He was caught trying to work a side job when he wasn't authorized to (he wasn't even POST certified or had been to the academy). At the side job he was wearing combat boots, jeans, a jail uniform top and a thigh rig with his personal HK pistol in it. Witnesses said he was standing around with his hands on his hips and justting his chest out as far as it would go.

He resigned in lieu of being fired over some check fraud charges. Even though he had married well (she was extremely rich) he decided to cheat on his wife with the waitress he was writing the bad checks to. He was giving her large checks that he wrote for the tip then convincing her to give some of it back as cash. The false checks had been printed on the computer so his wife wouldn't find out about his infidelity. As in all things it eventually did come to light when the waitress called his work as well as filed criminal charges. When all of it came to a head it lead to his divorce but before he was kicked out he managed to rack up a few domestic violence charges on the way out.

Last I heard, which was a few years ago, he was serving time for more check fraud/ identity theft as well as numerous violations of a order of protection.

That is the only time I have ever met a ninja that I know of, I guess I consider my self lucky for surviving the encounter.

Dolomite

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Guest nozzle13

Guest nozzle13

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HELL YEAH!! I'm gonna take this course! After taking the TR secret SEAL/Ninja course, I'll be able to whoop anyone that comes over my mommas house.

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tntnixon Established Contributor

tntnixon

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I just wonder if the guy from Clarksville will teach you the Judi chop, or if you can only learn the Ningy chop from him. I guess learning both would actually be mixed martial arts. Brock Lesnar will get his ass handed to him by Diamond Dave.

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Guest Lester Weevils

Guest Lester Weevils

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Those diemon dave videos are hilarious. It's got to be an act. Seems unlikely that anybody could really be that painfully stupid. Dunno though.

One of the youtube video comments was insightful about these Jerry Springer clips, "What's really funny is that the audience actually thinks that they are better than the people on stage."

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Guest db99wj

Guest db99wj

Posted
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Another thought is that Diemon Dave really should produce a few tactical firearms videos.

If he did, you could probably just say "video" singular, as in, no more would be made due to him capping himself!

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