The ostrich

[Guest Sgt. Joe]

THE OSTRICH

A man walks into a restaurant

With a full-grown ostrich behind him.

The waitress asks them for their orders.

The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to

The ostrich, 'What's yours?'

'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That

Will be $9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket

And pulls out the exact change plus five bucks for the tip for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again

And the man says, 'A hamburger, fries, and a coke.'

The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same.'

Again the man reaches into his

Pocket and pays with exact change including the five dollar tip.

This becomes routine for a few days until the two enter again.

'The usual?' asks the waitress.

'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak,

Baked potato and a salad,' says the man.

'Same,' says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitress brings the

Order and says, 'That will be $32.62.'

Once again the man pulls the exact change plus a ten dollar tip

Out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity

Any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage

To always come up with the exact

Change in your pocket every time?'

'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago

I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp.

When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared

And offered me two wishes.. My first wish was

That if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put

My hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would

Always be there.'

'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. 'Most

People would ask for a million dollars or something,

But you'll always be as rich as you

Want for as long as you live!'

'That's right.. Whether it's a gallon of milk

Or a Rolls Royce, I just think of the amount and the exact money is always

There,' says the man.

The waitress says, ' Well if I may what's with the ostrich?'

The man sighs, pauses and answers,

'My second wish was for a

Tall chick with a big butt and long legs who agrees with

Everything I say.' Kind of cute, isn't she?

[Shug]

Damn thats funny

[Guest HVAC Worker]

[Guest TnDeerHunter]

Now that's funny

[Guest BEARMAN]

LMAO! :rofl:

[Guest Sgt. Joe]

Folks, just remember if you ever do find one of these Genies your first wish should be that you have unlimited wishes....

Now if that does not work be very careful and specific with what you Do wish for....

The Female Genie...

While trying to escape through Pakistan , Osama Bin Laden found a bottle on the sand and picked it up.

Suddenly, a female genie rose from the bottle and with a smile said, "Master, may I grant you one wish?"

Osama responded," You ignorant, unworthy daughter-of-a-dog! Don't you know who I am? I don't need any common woman giving me anything."

The shocked genie said, "Please, I must grant you a wish or I will be returned to that bottle forever."

Osama thought a moment, then grumbled about the impertinence of the woman and said, "Very well, I want to awaken with three American women in my bed in the morning. So just do it and be off with you.â€

The annoyed genie said, "So be it!" and disappeared.

The next morning Bin Laden woke up in bed with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding, and Nancy Pelosi at his side.

His penis was gone, his knees were broken, and he had no health insurance.

God is good. Genies are dangerous.

Z29 de TB1...Tango Yankee k k k k k k

[FUJIMO]

rofl

[Chris]

lmao!

[Luckyforward]

Best laugh I've had all day!

[Chief07]

Good one!