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Democrat, Republican, or Tennessean???


titan14

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Posted

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Tennessean?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

#You're walking down a

Deserted street with your wife

And two small children.

Suddenly, an Islamic

Terrorist with a huge knife

Comes around the corner,

Locks eyes with you,

Screams obscenities, praises

Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a

Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.

You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What

Do

You do?

...................................................................

THINK CAREFULLY AND

THEN SCROLL DOWN:

Democrat's

Answer :

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him

That would inspire

Him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club

And knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about

This situation?

Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind

Of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be

Happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would

He be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold

On, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call

9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day

And make this happier, healthier street that

Would discourage such behavior..

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends

For few days and try to come to a consensus.

..................................................................... .......

Republican's

Answer:

BANG!

......................................................................

Tennesseans Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG !

Click..... (Sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG! BANG!

BANG! Click

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!

Were those the Winchester

Silver Tips or Hollow Points?'

Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?'

Wife: 'You ain't taking THAT to the Taxidermist!

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Top Posters In This Topic

Guest proudsuthrner
Posted

i would have to go with being a TENNESSEAN!!!!

Guest Bronker
Posted

I'd have to go with...Tennessean.

That's funny.

Posted
bet I can guess what kinda gun it was :D

You are carrying a

Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.

:devil::popcorn:

:D

Posted

guess I should read it all next time. Ive seen it a million different times with a little bit changed every time. sometimes it has more or less BANGs and the gun is not specified.

last version had no gun mentioned and it was southerner instead of tennessean

Posted
guess I should read it all next time. Ive seen it a million different times with a little bit changed every time. sometimes it has more or less BANGs and the gun is not specified.

last version had no gun mentioned and it was southerner instead of tennessean

Yeah, I've seen it here before. Still funny. I'm waiting for one with an XDM 9mm.

Posted

I'm going to have to stay Republican because that one piece of lead will take him down. If he's still twitching he might get a second one.

Seen that one before, too. Still funny:D

Posted
Yeah, I've seen it here before. Still funny. I'm waiting for one with an XDM 9mm.

Can you imagine how annoying reading 20 "BANG"s would be?

There's a guy down in Miami that suggests using a proton pack. If you're a real urban ninja, you could use two at once, providing you were safe enough to not cross the streams.

Posted

Sheriff's Interview

By Champ Miller

A young Texan grew up wanting to be a law man. He grew up big, 6'2", strong as a longhorn, and fast as a mustang. He could shoot a bottle cap tossed in the air at 40 paces. When he finally came of age he applied to where he had only dreamed of working: the West Texas Sheriff's Department.

After a big mess of tests and interviews the Chief Deputy finally called him into his office for the last interview.

The Chief Deputy says: "You're a big strong kid and you can really shoot. So far your qualifications all look good. But we have what you call an attitude suitability test that you must take before you can be accepted. We just don't let anyone carry our badge son."

Then, sliding a service pistol and a box of ammo across the desk, the Chief says:

"Take this pistol and go out and shoot: six illegal aliens, six lawyers, six meth dealers, six Muslim extremists, and a rabbit."

"Why do you want me to shoot the rabbit?" says the young Texan.

"Great attitude," says the Chief Deputy. When can you start?"

Posted

I guess I'm a Tennessean. Granted I'm a transplant, but I have to go with the scenario that requires a reload. The only problem I have is this: where is the part about beating his lifeless body with the empty gun? Of course that might mar the finish a bit, so I guess you could find a rock. :koolaid:

Guest Luckyshot
Posted

6.8 forgets that his sons (when we were kids) probably would have bigger knives than the terrorist.

Posted

Bigger guns and knives, son:lol:

Guest Muttling
Posted

ummmm.......I didn't realize a Newspaper would do that.

Guest Catdaddy
Posted

I put the first three in his ass before he made eye contact.

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