Chemical Warfare, The Geneva Convention and the Perfume Counter at Macy's...

[TMMT]

Why do all the little counter drones at these stores feel the need to hose down every Tom, Dick and harry that walks within striking distance of a spray bottle of perfume?

Even if they don't get you, you still have to navigate a sizable cloud made up of 1,328 of the latest fragrances.

Now my sinuses are all out of whack...

Maybe I should go back and just stand there, snotting all over the counter and chase the little perfume sprayer around sneezing on her?

I swear I think I read something in the Geneva Convention about this when I was in college...

[Guest H0TSH0T]

sniff some coffee beans it will clear you up. or use some of those outlawed zicam swabs, some of us still have a stash.

[Guest GimpyLeg]

Why do all the little counter drones at these stores feel the need to hose down every Tom, Dick and harry that walks within striking distance of a spray bottle of perfume?

Even if they don't get you, you still have to navigate a sizable cloud made up of 1,328 of the latest fragrances.

Now my sinuses are all out of whack...

Maybe I should go back and just stand there, snotting all over the counter and chase the little perfume sprayer around sneezing on her?

I swear I think I read something in the Geneva Convention about this when I was in college...

[Guest KarlS]

Nasty places. I once got stopped during Christmas season at one of these stinky joints. I ended up buying over $400 in gifts cause she was the breast salesperson ever.

[Motasyco]

The perfume terrorists are everywhere. There's not much more disgusting than a mouth full of perfume from some woman that pours it on before boarding a plane and then sitting down beside you. There's nowhere to escape. Or walking down the aisle in a supermarket or even Walmart and walking into an invisible cloud of perfume. The perfume particles coat the inside of my mouth and I can't get rid of the taste. Perhaps if these women would shower occasionally they wouldn't have to cover their smell by splashing on several ounces of cheap perfume. I'd rather walk into a cloud of flatulence, at least that doesn't usually stick to the inside of my mouth. (Although I recall recently hearing of a very unfortunate flatulence incident at a Tennessee gun show)

On the other hand, I've been told that I must have a super sensitive smeller. Is it just me or have you also experienced this type of despicable olfactory assault?

[Guest H0TSH0T]

lol, i have noticed the heaver the smell the heavier the woman.....

[mk19]

I'm pretty sure they'd step up their NBC warfare against you come shopping season.

[Kegger]

My trick is too fake an allergy attack.

Walked through Macy's with the girlfriend once and got hosed. Immediately started gasping, turned red, and fell down holding my throat. The lady freaked.

I got up and told her that's what could happen if she kept doing it. Pretty sure the message got through.

[Raoul]

lol, i have noticed the heaver the smell the heavier the woman.....

More surface area for application.

[oldogy]

The smell can be pretty bad. There was a gal in my office years ago who piled it on till a couple of us told her she had to back off some or change brands.

oldogy

[TGO David]

Nasty places. I once got stopped during Christmas season at one of these stinky joints. I ended up buying over $400 in gifts cause she was the breast salesperson ever.

[G27]

[Guest mustangdave]

lol, i have noticed the heaver the smell the heavier the woman.....

A "little" dab...just won't do...what about guys(?) that use cologne to de-louse...thats just as bad

[Guest mustangdave]

Its Christmas shopping season...time to make sure the Mk-5 gas mask is in tip top shape

[deerslayer]

I ended up buying over $400 in gifts cause she was the breast salesperson ever.

[Guest tnvolfan]

My trick is too fake an allergy attack.

Walked through Macy's with the girlfriend once and got hosed. Immediately started gasping, turned red, and fell down holding my throat. The lady freaked.

I got up and told her that's what could happen if she kept doing it. Pretty sure the message got through.

+10!!

You know, these idiots could TRULY cause someone an asthma attack by doing this, which wouldn't stop because the perfume is all over you and your body is reacting to an allergy. They will cause someone to have a heart attack someday, and then the long arm of the law will arrive!!