The Lie Clock

[dunndw]

Gotta try to lighten this place up a bit...

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him..

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.'

'Oh,' said the man, 'whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible,' said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded,'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's President OBamas clock?' asked the man.

Obamas clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan.

[Guest TurboniumOxide]

I hope jesus has some good paperweights.

[Guest Letereat!]

Hilarious, too bad no one is checkin this thread out.

[chemprof]

Now, that's funny! Thanks for the chuckle!

[timcalhoun]

Love it!!!

[southernasylum]

I heard this one first back when Clinton got elected. Still funny.

[Chief07]

Gotta try to lighten this place up a bit...

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him..

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.'

'Oh,' said the man, 'whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible,' said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded,'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's President OBamas clock?' asked the man.

Obamas clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan.

[kb4ns]

[Guest strelcevina]

That joke is as Old as a Greece

how about this one

Obamas Toilet Paper comes in 2 sizes........, 1/2 and 1 Gallon

[Raoul]

Love it.

[vontar]

I wonder if there is a speed control on the fan to slow it down? Perhaps Jesus is using a miracle speed control.

[oldogy]

Very old joke. The names change to reflect the most appropriate person. This one is right on target at this time.

oldogy

[Guest Letereat!]

strelcevina, I just gotta ask cause its been buggin the hell outa me for days now.

What point are you trying to make with your Sig. Scripture Proverbs 22:7

The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.

Your Rich and poverty is rampant all over the world?? Banks make slaves out of all of us? What??????

[USMCJG]

strelcevina, I just gotta ask cause its been buggin the hell outa me for days now.

What point are you trying to make with your Sig. Scripture Proverbs 22:7

Your Rich and poverty is rampant all over the world?? Banks make slaves out of all of us? What??????

strel is a socialist. He thinks we need to "spread the wealth".

[Guest strelcevina]

strelcevina, I just gotta ask cause its been buggin the hell outa me for days now.

What point are you trying to make with your Sig. Scripture Proverbs 22:7

Your Rich and poverty is rampant all over the world?? Banks make slaves out of all of us? What??????

If you ever listen Dave Ramsey on radio, you would know that he is using it as a daily prayer.

I just support it to.

If you don't believe in bible than don't. It is good to.

Just whatever u do don't believe those who say that is socialist "antichrist" way to believe in bible .