The Never Ending Story.

[Luckyforward]

And Mr. Spock says, “May I say that I have not thoroughly enjoyed serving with humans? I find their illogic and foolish emotions a constant irritant.”

[Sleep profit]

Then Captain Kirk looked up from his computer console while looking at the newest TGO memes and said it never bothered him 

[GlockSpock]

Spock and Kirk joined each other in a new addition to the Enterprise, a prototype improbability drive, and crossed their fingers as they entered the date May 4th, 1969.

Edited May 5, 2023 by GlockSpock

[RED333]

and when they arrived on May 4th, 1969, they found that the number one song was

From there they went to the ...

[Luckyforward]

But the teleporter took them into 1970 when the #1 song was . . .

 

[CMDRStormBorn]

Sunday morning, May 4th 1969 Canadian wilderness, Earth: by nightfall the Stanley Cup would be hard won by Montreal- but before that time would pass, a sonic boom would rattle the tree-line as the Enterprise hastily broke into low altitude atmosphere-her hull badly damaged from the time slip….

[Luckyforward]

And I awakened from this nightmare to find that my reality was . . .

[A.J. Holst]

A nasty hangover from finishing that handle of George Dickel. How ever would I celebrate Cinco de Mayo and enjoy that bottle of tequila...

Edited May 5, 2023 by A.J. Holst

[RED333]

NO, it would take 3 bottles of tequila to get over the sight of the...

Edited May 5, 2023 by RED333
Because I can!!!

[res308]

...carnage left by the events which had transpired over the last few days (or was it several?). Woe betide the world for that which Jack had witnessed through his eyes, dimmed by both horror and George Dickel, and for that which was to befall humanity in the ensuing weeks, for the worst was not yet. Worse fiends that those yet encountered were at the gate. These were those who truly believed that "real communism hadn't been tried yet."  Jack knew he must clear his head of the alcohol induced fog and prepare for fiercest battle yet to be had. As the gurgling, moaning sounds of these creatures drew nearer, Jack steadied himself, double checked his ammo supply, calmly slid his hand onto the plastic pearl grips, and drew his fully custom chrome High Point 1911...... 

 

(yeah I know it's more than one line. Forgive me for the indulgence)

Edited May 5, 2023 by res308

[Grayfox54]

Then they emerged, a full dozen beagle  pups. 

Note: every forum I've seen this tried on, the members took it into an absurdly  ridiculous comedy. You guys are weird. 

[Luckyforward]

Walking in front of the King of England as he entered Westminster Abbey

[RED333]

He cut wind, the smell was so bad the king fell to his knees and proclaimed...

[Grayfox54]

GOD SAVE THE KING! 

[CMDRStormBorn]

“Y'all need Jesus”, an audience member shrieked- as popcorn began to fly at the giant screen from all directions… 

[Gurn]

He realized how hungry he was after all this and didn’t want Doritos so he went to Publix and got a foot long Meatball sub.....

[RED333]

he did ask for the vegan meat ball sud, but the lady behind the counter made it with real meat, this cause the king to break wind him self and this caused the lady to...

[Garufa]

chastise his majesty for breaking wind before her, to which he replied “many pardons milady, we were not aware it was your turn”.

Edited May 6, 2023 by Garufa

[Luckyforward]

To end the story . . .

[res308]

…and end this horror….

[Grayfox54]

You guys are just no fun. 

[RED333]

1 hour ago, res308 said:

…and end this horror….

but around the corner came the biggest, meanest...

[Luckyforward]

Saint Bernard on the planet . . .

[res308]

…followed by a pale, gaunt man in tattered overalls hollering “Cujo! Cujo! I dun told you to stop eatin people. It upsets yer stomach and I gotta shovel it up after ya!”…

[RED333]

About that time I shot rang out, from around the back of the silo came a…