Arming 18yo daughter - opinions wanted

[whiskey]

My little girl is 18 and graduating high school in a few days. She will be moving into an apartment, with a 19yo female friend, near Austin Peay. I am considering sending her 20ga Mossberg Bantam with her.

 

For a little background on her: She started shooting a Crickett at 5yo, hunting squirrels at 6, hunting doves at 9, killed her first deer the month she turned 10, first turkey at 12, and hunted regularly till boys became a priority around 15. She is proficient with multiple long guns and pistols. At 14 she was home alone when the house alarm sounded. She locked herself in my bedroom, armed herself with a shotgun and a pistol before calling me. It was a false alarm, but she followed her training. She has had unrestricted access to firearms all her life, wether you agree or not, it's the path we chose. Needless to say, I feel she is educated enough to take the gun with her.

 

The other side of the coin is that she is a 18yo co-ed and I am certain there will be fun times and plenty of visitors coming and going. I do have concerns about mixing alcohol with a firearm present. She hasn't given me a single reason to expect irresponsibility, but I'm a dad and worrying is what I am good at.

 

I'd appreciate some opinions, experiences, and recommendations of rolling this out successfully, if I do chose to send her out armed.

 

 

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[hipower]

Firstly, I would like to say thank you for raising such a well rounded young lady. You certainly seem to have informed and educated her to a level of responsibility almost unheard of in today's society.

That being said, you have also shown wisdom in the areas of worry and what she may encounter while living the college life.

I will not presume to know what is best for her. With the obvious training you have given, it seems she would be comfortable with whatever you and she might choose together.

Others will surely have their own ideas, but I think the Mossberg with light loads is a good choice. Also possibly something like a S&W Govenor comes to mind.

Whatever the two of you choose, also factor in this roommate. Does she also have the same mindset and similar training? What might be her capabilities?

Picking a defensive weapon for both of them also adds to the mix.

 My best wishes for you in the search.

[whiskey]

Whatever the two of you choose, also factor in this roommate. Does she also have the same mindset and similar training? What might be her capabilities?
Picking a defensive weapon for both of them also adds to the mix.
 My best wishes for you in the search.

Good point! Her roommate is also a shooter. She hasn't had as much experience, but her responses to my questions were a consideration for sending the shotgun with them.



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[bud]

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Edited May 30, 2017 by bud

[DaveTN]

With alcohol and colleges students present adding a gun to the mix could be tragic. She would be faced with the same issues parents with small children are; how do you have a gun available if you need it, but not available to others. It can be done, but requires planning based on the situation. A handgun would be easier to deal with than a shotgun... IMO.

 

[1fast4by]

I too have a daughter who has grown up around firearms, she is 14 now, so I have 4 more years left to ponder this same question. My kid has never given me any reason to doubt her judgment in any way, and had been competently shooting pistols and long guns now for over 5 years (almost 10 years by the time she graduates HS). So, it would never be her I would worry about, its other people's less than intellectual children I worry about. Does she, generally speaking, associate with good kids? 

[whiskey]

I too have a daughter who has grown up around firearms, she is 14 now, so I have 4 more years left to ponder this same question. My kid has never given me any reason to doubt her judgment in any way, and had been competently shooting pistols and long guns now for over 5 years (almost 10 years by the time she graduates HS). So, it would never be her I would worry about, its other people's less than intellectual children I worry about. Does she, generally speaking, associate with good kids? 

She associates with kids her age, so by default there are a high percentage of idiots.


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[whiskey]

I too have a daughter who has grown up around firearms, she is 14 now, so I have 4 more years left to ponder this same question. My kid has never given me any reason to doubt her judgment in any way, and had been competently shooting pistols and long guns now for over 5 years (almost 10 years by the time she graduates HS). So, it would never be her I would worry about, its other people's less than intellectual children I worry about. Does she, generally speaking, associate with good kids? 

She associates with kids her age, so by default there are a high percentage of idiots.


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[300winmag]

I'd probably just give her a handgun to use because then she can take it in the car in the console/glove box when traveling from where you all live to where she goes to school or any other road trips.  I know she could have the shotgun loaded behind the seat of the car but that is a hassle when compared to a handgun in a console.  Buy one of those electronic handgun safes for the apartment when she is not at her apartment and she would be all set. 

[whiskey]

I'd probably just give her a handgun to use because then she can take it in the car in the console/glove box when traveling from where you all live to where she goes to school or any other road trips.  I know she could have the shotgun loaded behind the seat of the car but that is a hassle when compared to a handgun in a console.  Buy one of those electronic handgun safes for the apartment when she is not at her apartment and she would be all set. 

Was I wrong believing she had to be 21 to possess a handgun?


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[dralarms]

11 minutes ago, whiskey said:

 

Was I wrong believing she had to be 21 to possess a handgun?


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Can buy one at a gun dealer until 21. Can possess after 18. And the governor of judge would be a great option

[tacops]

I too am considering this same question...my daughter just completed her bachelors degree and will be moving to Birmingham to pursue her Doctorate over the next 3-4 years.  She will have an apartment on the south side in the Homewood area.  It is not so much her I worry about but guests in her home that may not have had the exposure she has with weapons.

[whiskey]

I too am considering this same question...my daughter just completed her bachelors degree and will be moving to Birmingham to pursue her Doctorate over the next 3-4 years.  She will have an apartment on the south side in the Homewood area.  It is not so much her I worry about but guests in her home that may not have had the exposure she has with weapons.

I would t send my kid to B'ham without a weapon.


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[MacGyver]

College is kind of a time to learn how to operate as a grown up - hopefully with some boundaries - and hopefully without permanent consequences.  

I think you've kind of answered your question.  She's around people her age - and some of them are going to do stupid stuff. Your responsibility as a parent is to help the consequences of that matter less. 

You've clearly done a great job so far. 

I wonder if a conversation about defense for a college aged girl coupled with some pepper spray and a good knife wouldn't be a better option?

On the firearm front I like a handgun with a lockable safe that can be bolted down.  College apartments aren't the most secure places.  I don't like the shotgun just because it's harder to secure.

 

[Erik88]

I'll echo some of what the others have said. I think it really boils down to whether or not your daughter and her roommate can keep this issue private. If they can find a good spot to keep a handgun out of sight and not tell anyone about it, I think it would be fine. 

As others of mentioned, I think the issues would arise when she mentions it to a male friend/boyfriend etc who then wants to look macho or try to impress them by screwing around with the gun. 

Perhaps some additional conversations with your daughter can solve these questions.

[whiskey]

I had lunch with my daughter today and we discussed this. For now she is more comfortable without a firearm. She wants to see how things play out in the beginning.

I am of the mindset now that if she does decide she needs a gun, that a quick access safe and a revolver would be the better option.


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[mikegideon]

15 minutes ago, whiskey said:

I had lunch with my daughter today and we discussed this. For now she is more comfortable without a firearm. She wants to see how things play out in the beginning.

I am of the mindset now that if she does decide she needs a gun, that a quick access safe and a revolver would be the better option.


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Let her choose the gun. It is natural to try to make a decision like that for women you love. That would be a mistake. 

[peejman]

Yep, let her choose and then supply a way to lock it up. 

[1fast4by]

I was talking with Maddie just now... She said "well of course you're letting me take my Glock arent you?" lol

 

I still have 4 years, I still have 4 years, I still have 4 years...

[Oh Shoot]

4 hours ago, whiskey said:

Was I wrong believing she had to be 21 to possess a handgun?

 

 

4 hours ago, dralarms said:

Can buy one at a gun dealer until 21. Can possess after 18. ...

Can also buy one in private sale or of course be gifted one at 18.

- OS

[Oh Shoot]

6 hours ago, 300winmag said:

I'd probably just give her a handgun to use because then she can take it in the car in the console/glove box when traveling from where you all live to where she goes to school or any other road trips. 

 

But technically as per law not on school property itself.

- OS

[Dustbuster]

Send her to a 3rd party Ccw class to help hone her judgement skills!


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[300winmag]

18 is the age to possess a handgun or buy one from an individual in TN.  You have to be 21 to buy a handgun or handgun ammo from an FFL

Some states do let 18 year olds carry handguns.  I personally do not think it is a big deal for an 18 year old to have a handgun.  I legally had a handgun at that age and did carry it legally on me and in my vehicle at times.  I think it is a good idea for a young lady traveling alone and of course living in an apartment.  I'd just look at one of those electric pistol safes if there is a roommate to keep the roommate or other unauthorized people from handling the gun when not at apartment.

[btq96r]

Where she's going to be living is a big part of this conversation.  Dorms, student oriented housing, greater Clarksville area...all will have slightly different considerations to factor in. 

[Oh Shoot]

4 hours ago, 300winmag said:

..... You have to be 21 to buy a handgun or handgun ammo from an FFL

Well, of course you don't have to have an FFL to sell ammo (unless you are a manufacturer or importer), and there's really not a federal law saying non-FFLs can't sell handgun ammo to 18 year olds (heck, or even to minors if state law specifically allows it). Though most seem to make at least a token effort to abide by the same guidelines. This is often just a checkbox online, though.

Not to mention of course, that there isn't an official federal listing of just what calibers constitute "handgun ammo". So that's why Wally and some others just "ask" what yer gonna put it in if they don't know you are at least 21.

Shrewd law, all in all, lots of wiggle room. 

- OS

Edited May 21, 2017 by Oh Shoot