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Guess I have been gone a long time


ebow2

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Posted

Ho Lee Hel. TGODavid was nice enough to spot me a benefactor membership for the month, some comments got going about me being the old Ebow1 and the legend of throwing the pizza oven so I just spent the last hour re-reading through that thread. I forgot just how much went into that. And I guess I forgot how long I'd been gone. I think I got tired of looking at the guns for sale and never being able to afford them. Anyways, I guess I'm back, so I thought I'd catch everybody up what's happened since that Domino's nonsense. I know there were a lot of justified speculations about my maturity. Well let's see, after Domino's there was Applebee's. That didn't last long, truly I just can't run a kitchen when I'm sober (seriously). Then there was pizza hut and driving for them, while working the campus bookstore and going to school. Finished out school at some point with a 2 year police science degree, was working for Papa John's by then. Got my truck totaled. Some guy tried to run a red light and I was there just in time to stop him. Ended up leaving Papa John's what with not having a vehicle and got a job working at Deberry, being that I was still out of shape, I thought I could work a prison job and get in good enough shape to become a cop. Yeah no such luck. Never exactly had a whole lot of spare time with that job. I ended up leaving that job with a two weeks notice. It was turning me into a level of asshole that I just didn't like what I was becoming. But I can say this much, I put up with a lot worse than one asshole manager without any violent outbursts. Went to work 3rd shift at a Shell in the meantime, heard about TN reconnect, decided to go to school again into a nursing program (didn't want that initially but it was what the state was willing to pay for). Had to leave the Shell cause I couldn't make enough at that job with my school schedule the way it was. Ended up driving again for a different Papa John's. Nursing didn't work, transferred to Phlebotomy, didn't pass that. Somewhere along the way I realized I've never really had an idea what I want to do with my life and that I've just been guessing. Well now I'm working at Valvoline and actually enjoy my job and like the company I'm working for. I've been in a serious relationship for a good amount of time now and she's helped me become a lot more mature. Don't know if yall were interested or not, but thought I'd share it as I guess I didn't realize how long it'd been.

  • Like 6
Posted
6 minutes ago, ebow2 said:

Ho Lee Hel. TGODavid was nice enough to spot me a benefactor membership for the month, some comments got going about me being the old Ebow1 and the legend of throwing the pizza oven so I just spent the last hour re-reading through that thread. I forgot just how much went into that. And I guess I forgot how long I'd been gone. I think I got tired of looking at the guns for sale and never being able to afford them. Anyways, I guess I'm back, so I thought I'd catch everybody up what's happened since that Domino's nonsense. I know there were a lot of justified speculations about my maturity. Well let's see, after Domino's there was Applebee's. That didn't last long, truly I just can't run a kitchen when I'm sober (seriously). Then there was pizza hut and driving for them, while working the campus bookstore and going to school. Finished out school at some point with a 2 year police science degree, was working for Papa John's by then. Got my truck totaled. Some guy tried to run a red light and I was there just in time to stop him. Ended up leaving Papa John's what with not having a vehicle and got a job working at Deberry, being that I was still out of shape, I thought I could work a prison job and get in good enough shape to become a cop. Yeah no such luck. Never exactly had a whole lot of spare time with that job. I ended up leaving that job with a two weeks notice. It was turning me into a level of asshole that I just didn't like what I was becoming. But I can say this much, I put up with a lot worse than one asshole manager without any violent outbursts. Went to work 3rd shift at a Shell in the meantime, heard about TN reconnect, decided to go to school again into a nursing program (didn't want that initially but it was what the state was willing to pay for). Had to leave the Shell cause I couldn't make enough at that job with my school schedule the way it was. Ended up driving again for a different Papa John's. Nursing didn't work, transferred to Phlebotomy, didn't pass that. Somewhere along the way I realized I've never really had an idea what I want to do with my life and that I've just been guessing. Well now I'm working at Valvoline and actually enjoy my job and like the company I'm working for. I've been in a serious relationship for a good amount of time now and she's helped me become a lot more mature. Don't know if yall were interested or not, but thought I'd share it as I guess I didn't realize how long it'd been.

Thanks for the update. :)

I'm wondering if your root cause of restlessness in life may be simply due to a clinical case of paragraphphobia. ;);)

- OS

  • Like 12
Posted
2 hours ago, Raoul said:

Well, welcome back. Oddly my takeaway from this is that you should stay away from pizza.

I think that could be said for many of us.

  • Like 3
  • Administrator
Posted

Going to give you some advice that may seem somewhat unsolicited, but maybe you were hoping folks would offer some?  Anyway...

I think your problems, or at least the past ones, stem from two major things:  Impatience (leading to anger) and lack of resolve to see something through to completion.  Thematically, the experiences that you described were short-lived and terminated by your own hand.  A few of them you rationalized were out of your control, but you still ended them yourself:

  • Fired from one job for throwing a pizza
  • Didn't have the resolve to run a kitchen job (sober)
  • Wasn't easy to find time to exercise while working a prison job, so you didn't
  • Nursing education didn't work out for undisclosed reason
  • Phlebotomy education didn't work out because you didn't prep enough to pass the exams

So my advice is this:

Sack up.  Life isn't easy.  Hard work and perseverance will take you past where talent or natural gifts (such as academics coming easy) let off.  There's nothing wrong with bouncing around between things while you figure out what makes you happy, but there's a nothing right about giving up prematurely or blaming outcomes on circumstance.

You are the master of your own destiny.  Make your own "luck".  Find something in life and stick with it past the point of your own comfort, just to prove to yourself that you can and so that you discover that "comfort" is a state of mind and therefore something that you control.

Just some honest talk from someone who was restless in his 20's and thankfully had someone sit him down and talk to him like this.  I hope you get it all figured out.

 

  • Like 9
Posted

Ebow, I recently got crapped on by my company of 5+ years and fired. They accused me of doing something pretty severe which I didn't do and essentially made me fall on the sword. Needless to say, there have been many days the last few weeks where I've wanted to have an Ebow moment and it's been hard for me to let go of the anger. What I wanted to suggest is that you do some reading on Emotional Intelligence.  Since I've had time to kill I've been reading a lot and trying to figure out how I can improve myself at the next company.

Anyways, I think you might benefit from reading some of this like I have.

http://www.inc.com/john-rampton/10-qualities-of-people-with-high-emotional-intelligence.html

 

Posted

Whether you partake in the opium of the masses or not, I've got you in my prayers.

You recognize where you were and you may have been part of the problem.

You are now doing work in an environment you like.

You have good woman; good women typically don't invest in total tools and total tools don't give credit to their women.

I pray the Lord showers you with the patience of Job!

Posted

At 17, I had a wife with a baby on the way, and a future of crappy gas station jobs.  Bad circumstances?  Yes, sure they were, but they were of my own creation.  My plans prior to this situation was Army ROTC college followed by a commission in and career in the army.  Well after screwing that up due to a misspent youth, lol,  I enlisted in the USAF the week I turned 18.  Went to basic then the police academy at Lackland AFB, Texas.  It was tough on the lower enlisted salary back then.  I had to work a couple part time civilian jobs in addition to my USAF job for a few years.  I grew up in the military after my enlistment.  Many times it sucked and many times I hated it.  But overall, I truly believe it saved my life.  It certainly instilled in me many qualities that I see as very positive:  loyalty to one's country and fellow service members and friends, , an appreciation  for the US Constitution, a strong work ethic, a respect for authority, and many more than I have time to mention here. I consider myself fortunate that I was able to stay for a career of 20 years, 14 of which was overseas.  Im considered fairly  successful in my post military career, leading over 50 employees in providing service to others, largely because of the values instilled in me during those military years.  Moral of this story:  It's not for everyone of course, but the military can be a good place for a young man to find his head and get a sense of direction in life.  Its also worth trying hard to get into if at first you dont succeed.

Posted

Thanks everybody. I do appreciate the advice and support. I wasn't sure if yall would have any interest so I didn't get too much into detail but I guess I will now. I've matured a lot since the Domino's ragefest. I would also like to note that the franchise owner of that location (and several others across TN) has since lost those locations. Apparently he couldn't keep them afloat, and I was to discover that I was only the beginning of a wave of staff walking out at my location. Let's see, I kept bouncing around different pizza places because, if you've driven before they'll hire you without an interview almost every time. It didn't work out at Applebee's not because of lack of resolve, but because I literally discovered at the job that when I'm in a kitchen sober I can't find anything to save my life. When I cook at home I'm usually drinking, and the result seems to be that when I've some alcohol in me it's like I already know where everything is, even if I've only been in the kitchen once before in my life. Seriously it kinda freaks me out a little. The prison job I left of my own volition for a variety of reasons, not because of any lack of willingness to see things through, I started off working Mobile patrol for them and became the best in the state at it. I'm not exaggerating there either, when the commissioner was going to stop by the prison and inspect our mobile patrols by surprising us and showing up on perimeter road in his personal vehicle, my shift commander called me because the prison found out he was coming in on one of my off days and they wanted me there. I turned that post around from a place where they put people who couldn't run a pod into the place where if you can't hack it on mobile you get sent to run a pod. After my shift commander retired the new one changed my post assignment to a wandering post (different pods from day to day). The result was me picking up a lot of other peoples' slack only to do it all over again, while getting flack constantly from inmates cause I was the guy who enforced the rules, but I couldn't get it to stick cause I was never in one pod longer than 1 day in a row. I didn't like the fact that they took something I took pride in (my mobile post) and ruined it by re-staffing it with their worst officers, but I got splashed in the face with urine and my Cpl. actually sided with inmate because I refused to give him an extra chow tray, I'd decided I had had enough and turned in my two weeks at the prison. The gas station job I left because of circumstances. I couldn't work enough hours with my school schedule to make the money I needed to cover bills. It was somewhere during the gas station job that I started the relationship I'm in now which has greatly helped me mature, but the prison job did too in it's own way. I went back to Papa John's to drive for them while I was in school. My girlfriend moved in with me to get out of a really bad situation with her roommates after getting screwed over by her company. She went to work driving my car for Papa John's while I went to school. Nursing didn't work out. Honestly I never should have gone into it. I only did it because the state would pay for it but that was a stupid reason to make that decision. Money got tight, I ended up going back to work inside for Papa John's while my girlfriend drove. Car crapped out. The reason I failed phlebotomy wasn't exams. It was the field portion. You have to have a certain number of sticks with a 77% success rate. I found out late in the program that I had little to no chance of making that ratio, after doing my own math to check my numbers. That's when I talked to people to get some help and found out my classmates were mostly just lying about their sticks and not reporting their misses in order to pass. I refused to do that. Even if you toss integrity out the window it's downright stupid to begin a career by giving your future employers false expectations of your capabilities. A lot of other things were happening in this time. I lost a good friend to cancer. A good man. Another person who helped me become a lot more mature, just a little over a year ago. Me and the girlfriend have just kept working, walking to work when we have to, getting rides from friends when we can. We saved up, and got another car from a friend just last week. Which then got totaled a day later as my girlfriend was leaving the store right after her shift. So now here we are, keeping our heads above water, trying to sell a variety of things to recover in between paychecks. Oh, I forgot to mention, I picked up a bogus DUI charge in Williamson county back in July. I actually go to court tomorrow morning to finally get it sorted. I was actually the designated driver for my girlfriend coming home from a party. I got pulled over for speeding, officer asked about alcohol, I admitted to him we were coming back from a party but I was sober and that's why I was driving. They put through a field sobriety test which I apparently failed, refuse to breathalyze me, so then I have them take my blood. This was back in early July. Court date gets set for October, October comes I hear from my public defender that the alcohol results came back 0.00% (as I knew they would) and I go to court to find that the court date is getting moved to 12/5 since they need more time to test my blood for drugs. I can assure you all that will also come back clean. So yeah. It's been crazy. My girlfriend and I have been each other's rock throughout all of it. And I've even left out all the backstabbing "friends" even going so far as to try to cause strife in our relationship.

Posted (edited)

Hey, I was half serious about the paragraph stuff. But only if you want people to actually read your posts and all!

See how much better this flows to the eyes and brain, eh?:

- OS

 

4 hours ago, ebow2 said:

Thanks everybody. I do appreciate the advice and support. I wasn't sure if yall would have any interest so I didn't get too much into detail but I guess I will now.

I've matured a lot since the Domino's ragefest. I would also like to note that the franchise owner of that location (and several others across TN) has since lost those locations. Apparently he couldn't keep them afloat, and I was to discover that I was only the beginning of a wave of staff walking out at my location.

Let's see, I kept bouncing around different pizza places because, if you've driven before they'll hire you without an interview almost every time. It didn't work out at Applebee's not because of lack of resolve, but because I literally discovered at the job that when I'm in a kitchen sober I can't find anything to save my life. When I cook at home I'm usually drinking, and the result seems to be that when I've some alcohol in me it's like I already know where everything is, even if I've only been in the kitchen once before in my life. Seriously it kinda freaks me out a little.

The prison job I left of my own volition for a variety of reasons, not because of any lack of willingness to see things through, I started off working Mobile patrol for them and became the best in the state at it. I'm not exaggerating there either, when the commissioner was going to stop by the prison and inspect our mobile patrols by surprising us and showing up on perimeter road in his personal vehicle, my shift commander called me because the prison found out he was coming in on one of my off days and they wanted me there. I turned that post around from a place where they put people who couldn't run a pod into the place where if you can't hack it on mobile you get sent to run a pod. After my shift commander retired the new one changed my post assignment to a wandering post (different pods from day to day). The result was me picking up a lot of other peoples' slack only to do it all over again, while getting flack constantly from inmates cause I was the guy who enforced the rules, but I couldn't get it to stick cause I was never in one pod longer than 1 day in a row. I didn't like the fact that they took something I took pride in (my mobile post) and ruined it by re-staffing it with their worst officers, but I got splashed in the face with urine and my Cpl. actually sided with inmate because I refused to give him an extra chow tray, I'd decided I had had enough and turned in my two weeks at the prison.

The gas station job I left because of circumstances. I couldn't work enough hours with my school schedule to make the money I needed to cover bills.

It was somewhere during the gas station job that I started the relationship I'm in now which has greatly helped me mature, but the prison job did too in it's own way. I went back to Papa John's to drive for them while I was in school. My girlfriend moved in with me to get out of a really bad situation with her roommates after getting screwed over by her company. She went to work driving my car for Papa John's while I went to school.

Nursing didn't work out. Honestly I never should have gone into it. I only did it because the state would pay for it but that was a stupid reason to make that decision. Money got tight, I ended up going back to work inside for Papa John's while my girlfriend drove. Car crapped out. The reason I failed phlebotomy wasn't exams. It was the field portion. You have to have a certain number of sticks with a 77% success rate. I found out late in the program that I had little to no chance of making that ratio, after doing my own math to check my numbers. That's when I talked to people to get some help and found out my classmates were mostly just lying about their sticks and not reporting their misses in order to pass. I refused to do that. Even if you toss integrity out the window it's downright stupid to begin a career by giving your future employers false expectations of your capabilities.

A lot of other things were happening in this time. I lost a good friend to cancer. A good man. Another person who helped me become a lot more mature, just a little over a year ago. Me and the girlfriend have just kept working, walking to work when we have to, getting rides from friends when we can. We saved up, and got another car from a friend just last week. Which then got totaled a day later as my girlfriend was leaving the store right after her shift.

So now here we are, keeping our heads above water, trying to sell a variety of things to recover in between paychecks.

Oh, I forgot to mention, I picked up a bogus DUI charge in Williamson county back in July. I actually go to court tomorrow morning to finally get it sorted. I was actually the designated driver for my girlfriend coming home from a party. I got pulled over for speeding, officer asked about alcohol, I admitted to him we were coming back from a party but I was sober and that's why I was driving. They put through a field sobriety test which I apparently failed, refuse to breathalyze me, so then I have them take my blood. This was back in early July. Court date gets set for October, October comes I hear from my public defender that the alcohol results came back 0.00% (as I knew they would) and I go to court to find that the court date is getting moved to 12/5 since they need more time to test my blood for drugs. I can assure you all that will also come back clean.

So yeah. It's been crazy. My girlfriend and I have been each other's rock throughout all of it. And I've even left out all the backstabbing "friends" even going so far as to try to cause strife in our relationship.

 

Edited by Oh Shoot
  • Like 3
  • Moderators
Posted
I am regretting my decision a little. default_meh.gif
 


Ehh. It's Christmas. Lighten up a little. He hasn't started Jade Helming, Shepherd Mastering, or CommBombing yet.

As a test we should ask him .40 S&W vs 10mm.

:D


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  • Like 1
Posted

Wow.. I've read through the posts...yeah I remember ebow. All I'm going to say is TGO David provided sound advice. I didn't achieve any degree of maturity until my late twenties and was still pretty restless at times. The bottom line though you've got to find what you like or what you really want and keep chipping away at it until you succeed. There's nothing wrong with general to skilled labor positions, way to many people consider that line of work beneath them. What is wrong and will limit your opportunities is constant job hopping.

I don't know how old ebow is but I'm thinking a military enlistment or even going in the National Guard is worth consideration. It's sure a good way to get a fresh start or your head screwed on straight.

 

 

Posted
4 hours ago, ebow2 said:

They put through a field sobriety test which I apparently failed, refuse to breathalyze me, so then I have them take my blood.

FWIW...you're under no obligation to take the field sobriety test.  You can flat out refuse it.  Tennessee's implied consent law only addresses blood, breath, or urine.

 

Posted

Ebow, as I read your posts, I keep thinking, "Here's a guy that needs to find a trade." Plumbers, electricians, welders, mechanics all make a very good living, and most times those jobs aren't difficult to learn. You might have been better served by going to trade school instead of college. A lot of trade schools can be attended in the evening, and for a short while, then you are ready to go. Or, find someone willing to take you under their wing as a helper and learn on the job. It's gotta be as good as, if not better than hucking pizzas, pay-wise.

  • Like 3
Posted
3 hours ago, analog_kidd said:

Ebow, as I read your posts, I keep thinking, "Here's a guy that needs to find a trade." Plumbers, electricians, welders, mechanics all make a very good living, and most times those jobs aren't difficult to learn. You might have been better served by going to trade school instead of college. A lot of trade schools can be attended in the evening, and for a short while, then you are ready to go. Or, find someone willing to take you under their wing as a helper and learn on the job. It's gotta be as good as, if not better than hucking pizzas, pay-wise.

This, plus the boss's advice, plus stop drinking. Success is hard. If it was easy, anyone could do it. 

  • Like 2
Posted
21 minutes ago, peejman said:

This, plus the boss's advice, plus stop drinking. Success is hard. If it was easy, anyone could do it. 

+1 from me.

I have a degree and still found myself selling vaccum cleaners door to door, unloading semis by hand, crawling around in flower beds pulling weeds, and basically doing whatever I needed to pay the bills for a while. Sucked big time but I paid rent, fed the family, and eventually found something better.

Very few people work because they want to. We have bills to pay. Putting up with #### is part of it. Sometimes you just find a job with less #### to deal with. It is easier to find one of those if you can offer employers something that stands you out from the crowd of applicants. A positive work ethic, willingness to learn, or skills learned on previous jobs. All these can help you get and keep a job.

I also agree with the trade comment earlier. Plumbers, electricians, masons, and carpenters can all make really good money once you work at it a while. You may start as a grunt, but work good and show interest and a lot of the good ones will share their skills with you.

 

Posted

Oh yeah, got done with court. It was rescheduled again to the 14th. Just wish they would've told me that.

As far as a trade goes, I have been looking into trying to become a butcher. I really like the idea of it. As much as I like to cook I really learn more about different cuts of meat and my best work has always been in the seasoning of the food before the actual cooking, I just haven't had much luck breaking into that here in Nashville. I'm limited to places I can walk to if I have to, and the only grocery store meat department job I can find in that area is Krogers and they only do part time. Plus I'm fat and hairy and built for cold weather, so spending a good chunk of a shift in a freezer isn't an issue for me.

As far as the drinking goes, I really don't do that near as much as I used to, but I am someone who likes to have a couple of beers after work on a regular basis, and some good scotch on special occassions.

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