gun sane

Felt an urge to run against Lamar, but the fire in his belly turned out to be bad liquor.

Flunked the TSA employment test when he couldn't find an ass with both hands.

I tried Basil Hayden's Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey tonight on the recommendation of my local liquor pusher.  Pretty good going down.

Whenever he hears the song, "Afternoon Delight," he thinks of his nap.

When I was working as an aircraft mechanic a lot of guys owed their soul to the Snap-On route salesman, but Craftsman was always my go-to.  I haven't had to buy tools in years, but for whatever I need to do I'm sure Home Depot or even Ace Hardware will suffice. 

I've got a hunch this is why Roebuck pulled out years ago.

Three reasons why this is repulsive news to liberals:   (1)  It's Walmart.   (2)  Our president prefers dog.   (3)  Libs don't like FOX with anything.

  The day things do make sense is when we get our country back.

This will make you appreciate the prime donkey meat we get here.   http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Peace/2014/01/02/Fox-meat-makes-an-ass-of-Wal-Marts-China-donkey-product

Can't make up his mind if he wants to be a visionary.

His best idea so far:  Little League farm teams.

Voldemort's TGO mole.

Hell just froze over.   http://www.myfoxny.com/story/24340294/justice-delays-health-laws-birth-control-mandate

A duck checks in with his answering service.     "Hey, Phil Robertson's been calling you all morning."

Keeps Walmart shelves empty of jock itch cream.

I've pretty much settled on Red Dot or Titegroup for my .380 and 9mm.  I have AA#7 for my .40 S&W Hi-Point carbine loads and am still experimenting for my .357 lever action Rossi.  One thing I have ruled out are Remington primers.  The skin's too tough for light-strike pistols.  Federal, Winchester and CCI are thin enough for consistent performance.

Didn't know if he should have turned his clocks ahead or back one hour for New Year's Day.

Plays the Knockout Game, but always gives his opponent the first move.

Training small dogs to pull his sleigh.

Moved to Cosby because, "that's where the action is."  

Keeps people in stitches with his impersonation of President Franklin Pierce.

Likes women who like women.

Avoids TSA security checks and petting zoos for the same reason.

Found out that the woman he met in an internet chat room had a really big bandwidth.

Brags that there's no property tax on his ant farm.