so, what did you get her??
i agree, if she has super small hands, .380 is the minimum and only then loaded with the new Powerball load or even better, the Hornady XTP... both have significant penetration and excellent expansion....
i'd look very hard at the XDm 9 (any variant) with the interchangeable backstrap, (HK now offers some very fine weapons with interchangeable backstrap, but very spendy), S&W M&P come with interchangeables as well and has a strong reputation (don't personally have one, so can't comment)
again, don't know how small her hands are, but there are options for small handed women...
Just put a student in a XDm 9 compact, 5'2", very small hands, and she's very happy. She also liked the Kahr p9 and pm9, but the XDm offered more of what she was looking for as a beginning shooter...
just MHO, FWIW.