Back in the mid 90's there was a young football star who was recruited by Fla. St. He Signed with them and was so happy he got Bobby Bowden's face tattooed on his left butt cheek. A little over a year later he violated team rules and lost his scholarship.
After some dealing with the NCAA, he was able to go to Auburn to play for Terry Bowden. He was happy again and got Terry's face tattooed on his right butt cheek.
However, bad habits returned and the NCAA ruled that he lost all eligibility permanently.
He decided to join the military to try to turn his life around. During the physical exam, the bend over and spread 'em portion arrived.
"What's this?", the Dr. asked.
"Oh, that's just my college football coaches." the young man replied.
"Well, I recognize Steve Spurrier in the middle," the Dr. said, "but who are these other two guys?"